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Aigong said, "May I ask about Confucian conduct." Confucius replied, "I can't finish counting them all. If I count them all, I will stay. I can't finish them even if I change my servant."
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
After Ren Kai lost his power, he no longer disciplined himself. Someone asked He Qiao, "Why did you sit by and watch Yuan Pei fail without helping?" He said, "Yuan Pei is like Beixia Gate, which is about to fall apart. It cannot be supported by a single piece of wood."
Wang Shu was transferred to be the Minister of the Chancellery and was appointed as such when the matter was settled. Wendu said, "So I should yield to Du Xu." Lantian said, "Do you think I am capable of this?" Wendu said, "Why not? But being able to yield is a good thing, and I am afraid it should not be missed." Lantian said with emotion, "If you say you are capable, why should you yield? People say you are better than me, but you are definitely not as good as me."
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
The mourning period of two periods is three years; the mourning period of two years is two years. The mourning period of the ninth and seventh months is three periods; the mourning period of the fifth month is two periods; the mourning period of the third month is one period. Therefore, offering sacrifices at a certain time is a ritual; and ending mourning at a certain time is the way. Offering sacrifices is not the ending of mourning. Those who are buried three years later must offer sacrifices again, and the mourning period is not the same as the time between offering sacrifices. The great merit is the mourning of the master, and if it is three years, then sacrifices must be offered twice. For friends, only the yu and bu are required. If a scholar or concubine has a son, she shall be mourned for him, but if she has no son, then it is not required. If the grandparents, fathers, brothers and sisters are not born, the father shall be taxed for mourning, but the person shall not be taxed. If the parents, wife and eldest son of the monarch are mourned, the monarch shall not be taxed after the mourning is ended. For close ministers, the monarch shall wear this kind of clothes; the rest shall follow the mourning and not follow the tax. Although the monarch does not know about the mourning, the ministers have already worn it.
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