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The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
Duke Huan had a chief clerk who was good at distinguishing wine and would always order the clerk to taste it first when wine was available. Those who like him call him "Qingzhou Official" and those who dislike him call him "Pingyuan Inspector". There is Qi County in Qingzhou and Ge County in Pingyuan. "Chengshi" means "to the navel", and "Duyou" means "residing on the cauldron".
When Emperor Ming of Jin was a few years old, he sat on Emperor Yuan's lap. Someone came from Chang'an, and Emperor Yuan asked about the news from Luoxia, and burst into tears. Emperor Ming asked why he was crying. I told him my intention to cross the river to the east. He then asked Emperor Ming, "How far do you think Chang'an is compared to the sun?" He replied, "The sun is far away. Haven't you heard that people come from the side of the sun? How can you know it?" Emperor Yuan was surprised. Tomorrow I will gather all the ministers for a banquet, inform them of this intention, and ask them again. He replied, "The sun is near." The Yuan Emperor was dismayed and asked, "Why do you say something different from what you said yesterday?" He replied, "I can see the sun but not Chang'an."
The way of a gentleman is like starting from near when he wants to go far, and starting from low when he wants to climb high. The Book of Songs says: "Wife and wife are in harmony, like playing the harp and the lyre. Brothers are in harmony, and they are happy and indulgent. Be good to your family, and enjoy your wife and money." Confucius said: "Parents are obedient!"
Zisi said: "After three days of mourning, the coffin should be buried. Everything attached to the body must be sincere and trustworthy, and there should be no regrets. After three months, the coffin should be buried. Everything attached to the coffin must be sincere and trustworthy, and there should be no regrets. Three years of mourning is the limit, and once a person dies, he will not forget it. Therefore, a gentleman has a lifetime of worries, but no worries of one day. Therefore, he does not rejoice on the anniversary of his death."
Zhou Boren was the Minister of Personnel. He fell seriously ill at night in the province. At that time, Diao Xuanliang was the Minister of the Chancellery, and he rescued Bei and was very close to him. After a long time, there was a small loss. The next morning, Zhongzhi was informed and he came in a panic. As soon as he entered the house, Diao got out of bed and burst into tears, telling him about Boren's critical condition yesterday. Zhongzhi wrote on it by hand, and Diao made a copy of it and placed it beside the door. When he came forward, he did not even ask about the illness, but simply said, "You were a famous person in the Central Court, and you were as famous as He Changyu. How could you have any relationship with such a flatterer as Diao Xie?" Then he left.
He Yan, Deng Yang and Xiahou Xuan all asked Fu Gu to make friends with them, but Gu finally refused. Everyone then united them based on Xun Can's advice and said to Gu, "Xiahou Taichu was an outstanding man of his time and was humble towards you, but you have the opposite intention. If you get along with him, things will go well, but if you don't, there will be rifts. If the two virtuous people are like Mu, the country will be at peace. This is why Lin Xiangru put Lian Po below him." Fu said, "Xiahou Taichu has great ambitions and is hardworking. He is able to win false praise. He is truly a man who can ruin a country with his eloquence. He Yan and Deng Yang are ambitious but impetuous, knowledgeable but not particular, greedy on the outside but indifferent on the inside, they value similarities and hate differences, they talk a lot and are jealous. They talk a lot and are provocative, and they are jealous and have no friends. In my opinion, these three virtuous people are all corrupt people! Even if you keep them at a distance, you may suffer disaster, let alone those who are approachable?" Later, all of them turned out as he said.
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