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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Emperor Ming of Wei built a house for his grandmother at the Zhen family. After it was completed, he went to inspect it and asked his attendants, "What should we name the pavilion?" The attendant Miao Xi said, "Your Majesty is as wise as the wise king; and more virtuous than Zeng and Min. The establishment of this pavilion is a tribute to your uncle, so it should be named 'Weiyang'."
Hao Long served as a military officer in the Southern Barbarian Army under Duke Huan of Qin. On the third day of March, Hao Long met with the army and wrote a poem. Those who fail to do so will be fined three liters of wine. Long Chu thought he could not accept the punishment, so after drinking, he took up his pen and wrote a poem: "A fish jumps into the clear pond." Huan asked, "What is a fish?" He answered, "The barbarians call fish 'fish'." Huan Gong asked, "Why do you write in the barbarian language when you write a poem?" Long said, "I came a thousand miles to join you and was appointed as a military officer in the barbarian government. How can I not write in the barbarian language?"
Duke Xian of Wei fled and returned to Wei. When he reached the suburbs, he was about to arrange the city with his followers before entering. Liuzhuang said, "If everyone guards the altar of the state, who will hold the reins and follow; if everyone follows, who will guard the altar of the state? If the king returns to his country and has private interests, isn't it wrong?" He did not arrange the city.
When Prime Minister Wang was appointed Sikong, Tingwei Huan had two buns on his head, a bun on his head, and a staff. He peeked at him from the roadside and sighed, "People say A'long is ahead, so A'long is ahead on his own." Before he knew it, he arrived at the gate of the palace.
When Prime Minister Wang visited Yangzhou, he was greeted by hundreds of guests, all of whom had a favorable look on their faces. There were only a guest named Ren from Linhai and several Hu people with whom he had not yet gotten along. The Duke therefore went to Ren's border and said, "If you leave, there will be no one left in Linhai." Ren was overjoyed. As he passed by a Hu people, he snapped his fingers and said, "Lanjie, Lanjie." All the Hu people laughed, and everyone sitting there was happy.
The Master said, “When the lower orders the higher, they do not follow what the higher orders, but what the higher does. If the higher likes something, the lower will certainly be more aggressive. Therefore, one must be careful about what the higher likes and dislikes, because it is the model of the people. ”The Master said, “Yu was in office for three years, and the people followed him with benevolence. Does that mean he must be completely benevolent? The Book of Songs says, ‘The great Master Yin, the people all look up to you.’ The Book of Fu Xing says, ‘One man has a blessing, and millions of people rely on him.’ The Daya says, ‘The king’s trust is the model of the lower land.’”The Master said, “When the higher likes benevolence, the lower will compete to be the first to be benevolent. Therefore, the ruler of the people should show his will, teach the truth, and respect benevolence, so that he can love the people; the people will act in accordance with their own behavior to please his superior. The Book of Songs says, ‘There are shackles and virtues, and the four countries will obey him.’”
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