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The Empress of a Noble Family

The Qin Shi said: "

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The king’s parents and brothers, his uncle, his aunt, and his sister should be tabooed. The son should share the same taboo with his father. The mother’s taboo is taboo in the palace. The wife’s taboo is not mentioned by her side; if she has the same name as her aunt’s brother, she should be tabooed. For those who wear a cap in mourning, even if the mourning period is three years, it is OK. After the cap is worn in the second place, enter the palace to cry and dance, and do three times three times before leaving. For those who have the least merit, they can wear a cap on their sons and marry their sons. For the father, who has the least merit, they can wear a cap on their sons and marry their sons, and can marry their wives. Even if you have done a minor merit, you can wear a cap and marry a wife after you have finished crying; but for those who have done a minor merit, it is not allowed. All caps and mourning clothes should be worn with extravagant sleeves.

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The Master said: “Benevolence has numbers, and righteousness has lengths, shortnesses, smallnesses, and greatnesses. To be indifferent in the heart is to love the benevolence of others; to follow the law and strengthen it is to have resources The benevolent man. The Book of Songs says: 'There is a mulberry tree in Fengshui, how could King Wu not serve? He passed on his plan to his grandson and swallowed his son. King Wu was so kind!' It is the benevolence of several generations. The Guofeng says: 'I am not going to review it now, but the emperor will take care of my descendants.' It is the benevolence of a lifetime. Confucius said: "Benevolence is a heavy tool, and its path is far. Those who raise it cannot overcome it, and those who walk it cannot reach it. Those who take the most are benevolent. Isn't it difficult to be diligent in benevolence? Therefore, if a gentleman judges people by righteousness, it is difficult for him to be a man; If you look at people by their own standards, you will know that they are virtuous. ” The Master said, “There is only one person in the world who is at peace with his heart and who is benevolent. The Great Odes say, ‘Virtue is as light as a feather, and few people can raise it. I have tried to imitate it, but only Zhongshanfu raised it, and no one helped me with love. ’” The Lesser Odes say, ‘High mountains are admired and admired, and beautiful conduct is observed and admired. ’ The Master said, “The love of benevolence in the Book of Poetry is like this: He walks in the direction of the road, but gives up halfway. He forgets his old age, does not know that his years are insufficient, and bows his head day by day, working hard until he dies.” The Master said, “Benevolence has been difficult to achieve for a long time! Everyone loses what he likes; therefore, the mistakes of the benevolent are easily abandoned.” The Master said, “Respect is close to propriety, frugality is close to benevolence, and trustworthiness is close to affection. If one practices this with respect and humility, even if he makes mistakes, they will not be too serious. Respect is less likely to make mistakes, affection is trustworthy, and frugality is easy to tolerate. Are those who make mistakes because of this not rare? The Book of Poetry says, ‘A gentle and respectful person is the foundation of virtue. ’” The Master said, “Benevolence has been difficult to achieve for a long time, but only a gentleman can do it. Therefore, a gentleman does not make himself suffer for what he can do, nor does he make others ashamed for what they cannot do. Therefore, the sage’s way of governing behavior is not to control himself, but to make people feel ashamed and encouraged to act according to their words. He regulates people with etiquette, binds people with trust, decorates their appearance with clothes, and makes friends with them. He wants the people to be united. The Xiaoya says: “Do not be ashamed of others, and do not fear the heaven.” Therefore, when a gentleman wears his clothes, he should decorate his appearance with a gentleman’s appearance; when he has his appearance, he should decorate his words with a gentleman’s words; when he speaks, he should be sincere with a gentleman’s virtue. Therefore, a gentleman is ashamed to wear his clothes without his appearance, to have his appearance without his words, to have his words without his virtue, and to have his virtue without his behavior. Therefore, when a gentleman wears mourning clothes, he has a look of sorrow; when he wears a crown, he has a look of respect; when he wears armor, he has a look of not wanting to be humiliated. The Book of Songs says: “Only the pelican on the beam does not wet its wings; the son of the record does not match his clothes. ’”

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During Bo Gao's funeral, the envoys of the Kong family had not arrived yet, and Ran Zi took the silk bundle and rode a horse to lead them. Confucius said: "Strange! It makes me disloyal to Bo Gao."

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When attending the funeral of the mother, face west and cry until he is exhausted, pull up the hair and bare the body, go down to the east of the hall and take the seat, cry to the west, dance, wear a mourning robe and take off the mourning robe in the east of the order, bow to the guest and see off the guest as before. The ritual of visiting one’s father is to cry again without tying up one’s hair. When a woman attends a funeral, she ascends from the east steps, goes to the east, sits facing west, cries out her sorrow, wears her hair in the east bun, takes the throne, and dances with the host. A woman who attends a funeral does not attend the funeral, but goes to the tomb first, sits facing north, cries out her sorrow. The host is waiting for her, so she sits on the left side of the tomb, and the woman on the right side of the tomb. After she finishes her mourning, she ties up her hair, takes the host’s seat in the east, wears a mourning sash and a belt, cries out her sorrow, pays respect to the guest, returns to her seat, finishes her dance, and the attendant announces that the matter is complete. Then she wears a crown and goes home, enters the door on the left, faces north. After crying out loud, the host will tie up his hair and bare his clothes, then take the throne in the east, bow to the guest and dance. When the guest leaves, the host will bow to see him off; if there is a guest who arrives later, the host will bow to him and dance; and see the guest off as before. All the host's brothers will go out, and when they leave, they will stop crying, and the attendant will tell them to take their turn. After crying again, the host will tie up his hair and dance; after crying for the third time, the host will tie up his hair and dance again. After three days, the mourning period will be completed, and after crying for the fifth time, the attendant will tell them that the matter is over. For the mother, who is different from the father, one part of the hair is tied up, and the rest is exempted from the funeral, and the rest is the same as the funeral of the father.