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When Ruan Bubing lost his mother, Pei Linggong went to offer condolences. Ruan Fang was drunk, sat on the bed with his hair loose, and did not cry. Pei arrived, sat on the ground, cried and mourned, and then left. Someone asked Pei, "In a condolence ceremony, the host cries and the guests perform the rituals. Since Ruan didn't cry, why did you cry?" Pei said, "Ruan is an outsider, so he doesn't respect rituals. We are ordinary people, so we take rituals as our own." People at that time sighed that he had achieved the best of both worlds.
Confucians cleanse themselves and bathe in virtue, they keep their words to themselves, they are calm and correct, and their superiors do not know; they are rough and arrogant, and they do not rush to do things; they do not think they are high when they are deep, and they do not think they are much when they add a little; they do not despise the world in peace, and they do not get discouraged when the world is in chaos; they do not agree with the same, and they do not criticize the different. They are like this in their uniqueness.
Gu Sikong did not know his name, so he went to see Prime Minister Wang. Prime Minister Xiao Ji was tired of it. Gu thought about why he had to ask for his advice, and said to his companions, "I have often heard that Yuan Gongdao assisted Zhongzong and protected Jiangbei. He was a little uneasy, which made people gasp." The Prime Minister realized this and said to Gu, "This boy is very smart and sharp."
Zeng Zi asked: "Can the funeral of a major merit be included in the offering of sacrifices?" Confucius said: "It is not a major merit! "Zengzi asked, "Is it not possible to make sacrifices with light clothes?" Confucius said, "That is not what I mean. In the funerals of the Son of Heaven and the dukes, those who are in mourning clothes offer sacrifices; the high officials, those who are in mourning clothes offer sacrifices; the scholars, their friends offer sacrifices; if it is not enough, they take from those who are of great merit or less; if it is not enough, they take from those who are of great merit or less." Zengzi asked, "Can small merits be included in the sacrifices?" Confucius said, "Why must it be small merits? Those who are in mourning clothes and below offer sacrifices; that is etiquette." Zengzi asked, "Is it not possible to make sacrifices with light clothes?" Confucius said, "In the funerals of the Son of Heaven and the dukes, those who are not in mourning clothes do not offer sacrifices; the high officials, those who are in mourning clothes offer sacrifices; the scholars, if the sacrifice is not enough, they take from those who are of great merit or less." Zengzi asked, "Can acquaintances, if they are in mourning clothes, participate in the sacrifices?" Confucius said, "If you don't offer sacrifices, how can you help others?" Zengzi asked, "Can you take away your mourning clothes and participate in the sacrifices?" 鈥滳onfucius said: "Saying mourning and offering sacrifices are not rites; it is OK to reject each other."
Yu Yuanke went to see Sun Jian. On duty, he saw Qi Zhuang outside. He was still young, but had a spirit. Yu asked him, "Where is Sun Anguo?" He answered, "He is at Yu Zhigong's house." Yu laughed and said, "Sun Anguo is so successful that he has a son like this!" He answered again, "He is not as careful as Yu Anguo." When he returned, he said to others, "I won because of this, so I can call my father's name again."
A filial son will not obey the dark, will not take on dangerous tasks, for fear of humiliating his parents. While parents are alive, do not allow friends to die. No private property.
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