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An old friend of Confucius was Yuanrang. When his mother died, Confucius helped her wash the coffin. Yuanrang climbed a tree and said, "It has been a long time since I have trusted music." The song went, "The spotted head of a raccoon, holding the curled hand of a woman." Confucius passed by as someone who did not hear it. The follower said, "Can't you stop?" Confucius said, "I have heard that relatives should not lose their relatives, and the old ones should not lose their old ones."
When Lezheng Zichun's mother died, he did not eat for five days. He said, "I regret it. Since my mother didn't know my feelings, how can I use my feelings!"
If the eldest son is given a stick, his son will not take the position with the stick. For a wife, if the parents are alive, do not use a stick, do not bow the head. If the mother is alive, do not bow the head. Bowing the head means bowing in the gift. If you disobey the senior official of the princes, you will not return to wear clothes.
When Liu Yin went to meet Wang Changshi Xu Qingyan, Gou Zi was thirteen years old at that time, leaning against the bed and listening. After he left, he asked his father, "How is Liu Yin's speech compared to mine?" The chief secretary said, "His elegant voice and graceful words are not as good as mine; but he always defeats the enemy, and he is worse than me."
When Liu Lingyan first entered Luoyang, he saw many famous scholars and sighed, "Wang Yifu is too wise, I respect Le Yanfu, but I don't understand Zhang Maoxian, Zhou Hongwu is good at using his shortcomings, and Du Fangshu is clumsy at using his length."
Ni Heng was demoted by Emperor Wu of Wei to be a drummer, and was tested on the drums at 15th day of the first lunar month. The Hengyang gong was the Yuyang gong, and its sound was like that of metal and stone, which made the expressions of those sitting around change. Kong Rong said: "Ni Heng's crime is the same as Xu Mi's. He cannot reveal the king's dream." Wei Wu was ashamed and pardoned him.
The gentleman said: "Gently accept harmony, and accept white; loyal and faithful people can learn etiquette. If there is no loyal and faithful person, etiquette will not be in vain. Therefore, it is precious to get the right person. Confucius said: "Reciting three hundred poems in the Book of Songs is not enough for one offering. The ceremony of one offering is not enough for a great feast. The ceremony of a great feast is not enough for a great group. The great group is ready, but it is not enough for the feast of the emperor." Don't discuss etiquette lightly! Zilu was the chief of Ji's family. Ji's family offered sacrifices at dusk, and when the day was not enough, they continued with candles. Even if there is a strong face and a solemn and respectful heart, they are all tired. The officials limped and leaned to attend the sacrifice, which was a great disrespect. On other days when offering sacrifices, Zilu would be present. The affairs of the inner room would be handled at the door, and the affairs of the hall would be handled at the steps. They would start their activities at dawn and leave at dusk. Confucius heard this and said, "Who says that You doesn't know etiquette?
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