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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Yu Zigong was disabled and very well-known. His home was in the west of the city and was called the City West Mansion.
Xun Xu once ate bamboo shoots and served rice on the seat of Emperor Wu of Jin, and said to the people sitting there, "This is the result of hard work in cooking with firewood." The people sitting there did not believe him, so they sent someone to inquire about it secretly, and found out that it was actually done with the carriage legs.
After Deng Jingling was dismissed from office, he went to the mountain tomb and met the Grand Marshal Huan Gong. The Duke asked him, "Why have you become thinner?" Deng said, "I feel ashamed of Shuda, and I cannot help but feel resentful for the broken steamer!"
Wang Ziyou went to Xi Yongzhou. Inside Yongzhou, he saw something called (ximao) (dengmao) and said, "How did Aqina get this thing?" He ordered his attendants to send it back home. Xi came out to meet him, and the king said, "Just now there was a strong man who carried it and ran away." Xi showed no sign of disobedience.
Hemp is not a robe, and holding jade is not hemp. Hemp is not added to the collection. When the country prohibits crying, it only stops the morning and evening offerings. It is self-made when ascending the throne. When a boy cries, he does not lie down, jump, stick, use a penny, or stay. Confucius said: "Aunts and uncles, when they are in poor condition, do not jump to the ground. When the great achievement of aunts and sisters, jump to the ground. If you know this, you are well-educated! Well-educated! 鈥
Emperor Wu of Wei once passed by the Cao'e stele, and Yang Xiu followed him. On the back of the stele there was an inscription of eight characters: "young woman with yellow silk, grandson Jue". Wei Wu asked Xiu, "Do you understand it?" Xiu replied, "I understand." Wei Wu said, "You can't tell me yet. Let me think about it." After walking for thirty miles, Wei Wu said, "I have figured it out." He asked Xiu to write down what he had learned. Xiu said: "Yellow silk is colored silk, and the word for it is absolutely perfect. Young woman is a young girl, and the word for it is wonderful. Grandson is a girl, and the word for it is good. Juejiu is suffering, and the word for it is words. This is what is called 'absolutely wonderful and good words'." Wei Wu also memorized it, and he agreed with Xiu, so he sighed and said: "I am not as talented as you, and I feel thirty miles behind."
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