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Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
Guo Jingchun's poem says: "There are no still trees in the forest, and no still water in the river." Ruan Fu said: "The vastness and desolation are beyond words. Every time I read this, I feel that my spirit transcends my body."
The king creates music when his achievements are accomplished, and establishes rituals when his governance is established. Those who have great achievements have complete music, and those who have a good governance have complete rituals. The dance of Ganqi is not complete music, and those who are prosperous and worship are not complete rituals. The Five Emperors lived in different times, and did not follow each other's music; the Three Kings lived in different times, and did not follow each other's rituals. When music is excessive, it leads to worry, and when rituals are rough, they become biased. And when
Huan Xuan went to Yin in Jingzhou. Yin was sleeping during the day in his concubine's room, and his attendants refused to see him. When Queen Huan mentioned this, Yin said, "I didn't sleep at first. Even if there was this, wouldn't it be 'the virtuous can change the color'?"
When parents die, before offering sacrifices, brothers die; after the funeral, offering sacrifices are made. If they are in the same palace, even if they are servants or concubines, offering sacrifices are made after the funeral. During sacrifices, the host's ranks are divided, and the attendants are also divided. Even the Yu Fu are the same. From the princes to the scholars, during the minor sacrifices, the host spits when offering wine; the guests and brothers all spit at it. For the major sacrifices, the host spits, and the guests and brothers all drink it. Those who attend the sacrifices and funerals tell the guests to offer sacrifices but not to eat.
Wang Changshi was ill and his relatives and friends had difficulty communicating. When Lord Lin arrived, the gatekeeper immediately opened the door and said, "There is a stranger at the door. I dare not refuse to open the door." The king laughed and said, "This must be Lord Lin."
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