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In mourning, one should only look at the deceased but not answer; in mourning of the same age, one should answer but not speak; in mourning of the great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in mourning of the minor merit, one should discuss but not enjoy music. This is the expression of grief in speech.
Xie Huer was a writer and once wrote the biography of Wang Kan. I don’t know what kind of person I am, so I ask Mr. Xie for advice. Xie Gong replied, "The descendants of the family were also treated well. Kan is the son of Lie, the aunt's brother of Ruan Qianli, and Pan Anren is a middle-class man. As Anren's poem says, 'Your son is close to your aunt, and my father is only my uncle.' He is Xu Yun's son-in-law."
In ancient times, the crown ceremony was to divination the day and the guests, so as to respect the crown event, and to respect the crown event so as to attach importance to etiquette; attaching etiquette is the foundation of the country.
Auspicious is the host’s exemption. It starts at night and the morning is in mourning. The mourning period is the same as before. Ziyou said: “After the auspicious period, even those who should not wear mourning must wear mourning, and then they can wear mourning again. "When you are naked, when a senior official arrives, even if you are supposed to dance, you should stop dancing and bow, then dance again, then dance again, then dance again. For scholars, after the dance is done, they should dance again and then bow, not dance again. The funeral of senior officials is a small sacrifice. After the funeral, they cry and pay tribute, all of which are large sacrifices. The funeral of junior officials is a special sacrifice. After the funeral, they cry and pay tribute, all of which are small sacrifices. When the funeral is called by the oracle, the descendants are called Ai, the husband is called Nai, and the brothers are called Mou. The oracle for the burial of one's brothers is called Bo Zi Mou.
In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
When Huan Xuan was about to usurp the throne, he said to Bian Ju: "In the past, Yang Zidao always forbade me from doing this. Now that I have lost my confidant Yang Fu and my henchmen Suo Yuan, I have hastily made such slanders. How can this be in line with the will of Heaven?"
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