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At first, Fatai came to the north and was unknown, so the king led his army to support him. Whenever he went out with him, he would go to famous places in Xu and travel with him. If you don't eliminate it, you can't stop the car. Therefore, his name became important.
The people of Wei believed that turtles were knowledgeable. Chen Ziche died in Wei. His wife and her family's senior officials planned to bury him alive with her. After the plan was finalized, Chen Zikang arrived and told her, "My master is ill and there is no one to take care of him. Please bury him alive with me." Zikang said, "Burying him alive with me is not a courtesy. Even if I do, who should take care of him like my wife and the prime minister? If I have to, I will do it. If I have to, I will let my two sons do it." So he did not do it.
Xie Lingyun liked to wear a hat with a curved handle. The hermit Kong said to him, "If you want to have lofty ambitions, why can't you forget the appearance of the curved hat?" Xie replied, "If you will not be afraid of your shadow, you will not be able to forget it."
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. ” He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
When the husband of an aunt or sister dies, and there are no brothers in the husband's party, let the husband's family members take charge of the funeral. The wife's party, even if they are close, do not take charge. If the husband has no family, then the front and back families, the east and west families; if there is none, then the village Yin will take charge. Some say: take charge, and attach to the husband's party.
The meaning of the banquet etiquette of the princes: the king stands in the southeast of the steps to the east, facing the ministers to the south, and the ministers all move forward a little, which is the position; the king sits on the steps to the east, occupying the main position; the king stands alone on the seat, facing the west, and no one dares to approach him. It is the etiquette of setting up guests and drinking; letting the prime minister serve the host, and no minister dares to challenge the king in etiquette; not treating the ministers as guests, but the ministers as guests, is suspicious, which shows the meaning of suspicion; when the guests enter the central courtyard, the king lowers one level and bows to them, which is a courtesy.
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