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The so-called self-cultivation is to regulate one's family. One should avoid what one loves, avoid what one despises, avoid what one fears, avoid what one pities, and avoid what one is lazy about. Therefore, there are few people in the world who know the evil of what one likes and the beauty of what one hates. Therefore, there is a proverb: "No one knows the evil of his son, and no one knows the greatness of his seedling. "This means that if you do not cultivate yourself, you cannot manage your family.
Zhongni said: "The gentleman is moderate, the villain is the opposite of the moderate. The gentleman's moderation is the gentleman who is moderate at times; the villain's moderation is the villain who is unscrupulous."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
The king creates music when his achievements are accomplished, and establishes rituals when his governance is established. Those who have great achievements have complete music, and those who have a good governance have complete rituals. The dance of Ganqi is not complete music, and those who are prosperous and worship are not complete rituals. The Five Emperors lived in different times, and did not follow each other's music; the Three Kings lived in different times, and did not follow each other's rituals. When music is excessive, it leads to worry, and when rituals are rough, they become biased. And when
Prince Jing and Yang Sui were good friends. Sui was a noble and honest man. He was a secretary of the Central Secretariat but died young. The king mourned deeply and said to Dongting: "It is a pity for the country!"
General Yu fought with Su Jun and was defeated. He led more than ten people and fled west in a small boat. The soldiers were plundering each other and the arrow accidentally hit the beam worker, who fell down at the sound of the arrow. Everyone on the boat turned pale and dispersed. Liang remained unmoved and said slowly, "How can this hand be used to thieve chopsticks!" Everyone then calmed down.
The Master said: 鈥淚n the past, the wise kings of the Three Dynasties all worshipped the gods of heaven and earth, and used divination. They did not dare to use their private interests to disrespect the gods. Therefore, they did not violate the sun and the moon, and did not violate divination. Divination does not follow each other. Big events have their dates; small events have no dates, but divination. External events use hard days, internal events use soft days. They do not violate the tortoise shells. 鈥漈he Master said: 鈥淪acrifices, rituals and music are all prosperous, so there is no harm to the gods and ghosts, and no resentment from the people.鈥漈he Master said: 鈥淭he sacrifices of Hou Ji are easy to be rich; his words are respectful, his desires are frugal, and his salary is passed on to his descendants. The Book of Songs says: 鈥楬ou Ji鈥檚 omen sacrifices, and the people have no guilt and regret, and this has continued to this day. 鈥欌漈he Master said: 鈥淭he great man鈥檚 instrument is awe-inspiring. The Son of Heaven does not use divination; the princes have divination. The Son of Heaven uses divination for the way; the princes do not use divination for countries other than their own. Divination for the house and bedroom. The Son of Heaven does not use divination for the great temple. 鈥 Confucius said: 鈥淎 gentleman is respectful and uses sacrificial vessels. Therefore, he does not abandon the sun and the moon, does not violate the tortoise shells and divination, and respectfully serves his ruler. In this way, the superiors do not disrespect the people, and the inferiors do not disrespect the superiors.鈥
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