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For the funeral of a king: for three days, sons and wives use sticks, and after the funeral on the fifth day, the grand officials and their wives are given sticks. Sons and grand officials use sticks outside the bedroom door, and they are gathered inside the bedroom door; the wives and their wives are next and use sticks, and when he ascends the throne, he has someone hold them. Sons take off their sticks when they have the king's order, and gather their sticks when they have the king's order, and take off their sticks when they listen to divination and have something to do with the corpse. Grand officials gather their sticks when they are at the king's place, and they use sticks when they are at the grand officials' place. For the funeral of a grand official: after the funeral on the third day, the master, the master's wife, and the old man in the house all use sticks. Grand officials take off their sticks when they have the king's order, and gather their sticks when they have the order of the grand officials; the wife takes off her stick when she has the order of her wife, and she is given a stick when she has the order of her wife. For the funeral of a scholar: for two days, the funeral is held, and for three days, the master takes off his stick, and the wives all use sticks. For the king's order and the wife's order, the order is the same as for the grand officials, and for the grand officials and their wives' order, the order is the same as for the grand officials. Sons all use sticks, and they don't ascend the throne. When a senior official or scholar mourns a funeral, he uses a staff; when mourning over a coffin, he uses a staff. If he discards a staff, he breaks it and throws it to the hermit.

The Master said, "A gentleman does not use words to exhaust people. Therefore, when the world is governed by the Way, then actions have branches and leaves; when the world is not governed by the Way, then words have branches and leaves. Therefore, when a gentleman is at the side of a mourner and cannot give him a gift, he does not ask what he spends; when a sick person is at the side of a mourner and cannot give him a meal, he does not ask what he wants; when a guest is at a guest's house and cannot provide him with a guest, he does not ask where he stays. Therefore, the reception of a gentleman is like water, while that of a villain is like sweet wine; a gentleman is indifferent to success, while a villain is willing to be ruined. Xiaoya says: "A thief's words are sweet, and chaos is caused by glutinous rice." Confucius said: "A gentleman does not praise others with his words, so the people will be loyal. Therefore, a gentleman asks people if they are cold, then he clothes them; asks people if they are hungry, then he feeds them; praises people's beauty, then he gives them a title. Guofeng says: "The heart is worried, so I will go home and be happy." Confucius said: "If the mouth is good but the deeds are not fulfilled, resentment will come to the body. Therefore, a gentleman would rather have resentment than have a promise. Guofeng says: "Talking and laughing slowly, keeping promises, not thinking about the return; if you don't think about the return, what's the point!" Confucius said: "A gentleman does not get close to people with his appearance; if he is distant in affection but close in appearance, is he a thief who robs houses?" Confucius said: "The feelings should be trustworthy, and the words should be clever. ”




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更新时间:2025-03-15

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