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Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
When Ruan Xuanzi had a good reputation, the Grand Commandant Wang Yifu saw him and asked, "Are the teachings of Laozi and Zhuangzi similar or different from those of the sages?" Ruan Xuanzi replied, "There may be no similarities." The Grand Commandant was pleased with his words and appointed him as an official. People in the world call him "three-language official". Wei Jie mocked him and said, “One word can refute it, why bother with three?” Xuan Zi said, “If he is respected by the world, I can refute him without saying a word, why bother with one word?” So they became friends.
When Gongshu Wenzi died, his son Shu asked the king for a posthumous title, saying: "The sun and the moon have their time, and I will be buried. Please change his name." The king said: "In the past, Wei was in a disaster and famine, and the Master made porridge for the hungry people in the country. Wasn't it a kindness? In the past, Wei was in trouble, and the Master used his death to protect me. Wasn't it a loyalty? The Master listened to the government of Wei, improved its system, and made friends with the neighbors. The state of Wei was not humiliated. Wasn't it a culture? Therefore, the Master is called "Zhenhui Wenzi."
Confucians have a palace of one acre, a room with round walls, a door with bamboo, a thatched door and a window with urns; they change their clothes and go out, and eat every day. They dare not doubt the emperor's answer, and dare not flatter the emperor's answer. They are like this in their official career.
No one can escape the funeral procession unless they follow the coffin and cry. In all funerals, from minor to major, no bathing is allowed unless there are auspicious signs such as the mourning clothes and the funeral rites. In the case of a funeral of a young man, after the burial, if someone asks to see the deceased, then he can see the deceased; but if no one asks to see the deceased, then he can see the deceased. In the case of a minor funeral, then he can see the deceased if he asks to see the deceased. In the case of a major funeral, then he does not need to hold the coffin. Only in the case of a parent’s funeral, one does not need to weep and see the deceased. In the case of a three-year funeral, auspicious signs are followed; in the case of a full-term funeral, one cries and follows the deceased’s funeral; in the case of a nine-month funeral, after the burial, one follows the deceased’s funeral; in the case of a minor funeral, after the funeral, one follows the deceased’s funeral. Zeng Shen asked Zeng Zi, “Is there a fixed sound for crying parents?” Zeng Zi replied, “A baby lost its mother on the way, so what fixed sound is there?” ”
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