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Zeng Zi asked: "Do you mourn for three years?" Confucius said: "In the three-year mourning, you should be dressed, not stand in a group, and do not travel. Gentlemen use etiquette to embellish their feelings. If you mourn for three years, isn't it empty?" Zeng Zi asked: "The officials and scholars can get rid of their private mourning, but they have the monarch's mourning clothes. How can they get rid of it?" Confucius said: "If you have the monarch's mourning clothes on your body, you dare not wear them privately. How can you get rid of them? So it is not removed after the time has passed. In the case of the king's mourning, mourning is removed before offering sacrifices, which is a ritual. Zengzi asked, "Is it okay not to remove mourning for parents?" Confucius said, "The ancient kings established rituals, and did not perform them after the time has passed, which is a ritual; it is not that they cannot do it, but they are worried that it is too much. Therefore, a gentleman does not offer sacrifices after the time has passed, which is a ritual. Zengzi asked, "When the king dies, after the funeral, if the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Return home and live at home. If there are important things, go to the king's place and see him off morning and evening." He said, "After the king has been buried, if the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Go home and cry and come back to see the king off." He said, "If the king has not buried his parents, and the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Go home and cry and come back to see the king off. If there are important things, go back and see him off morning and evening. For officials, the old man in the house will perform the ritual; for scholars, the descendants will perform the ritual. The wife of a great official, if there is a serious matter, should also go to the king's place, morning and night. "
When Zhi Daoling returned to the east, the wise men of the time saw him off at Zhenglu Pavilion. Cai Zishu came forward and sat close to Lin Gong. Xie Wanshi came later and sat a little far away. Cai got up temporarily, and Xie moved to his place. When Cai returned, he saw Xie there. He folded the mattress, lifted Xie up and threw him to the ground, then sat down again. He thanked the emperor for taking off his hat and cap, then slowly stood up, straightened his clothes and sat down on the mat. He looked very calm and not angry or frustrated at all. After sitting down, he said to Cai, "You are a strange man, and you may ruin my reputation." Cai replied, "I don't care about your reputation." After that, neither of them minded.
A gentleman has three worries: if he has not heard it, he worries that he will not be able to hear it; if he has heard it, he worries that he will not be able to learn it; if he has learned it, he worries that he will not be able to practice it. A gentleman has five shames: if he is in his position but does not speak the right words, he is ashamed; if he has the right words but does not act the right words, he is ashamed; if he has gained it and then lost it, he is ashamed; if the land is surplus but the people are insufficient, he is ashamed; if the number of people is equal but double, he is ashamed.
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