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Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
Gu Changkang said: "It is easy to play the five-stringed instrument, but it is difficult to watch the wild geese fly back home."
When Ruan Ji's mother died, he enjoyed wine and meat in the presence of King Wen of Jin. Si Li He Zeng was also present and said, "Your Excellency is ruling the world with filial piety, but Ruan Ji is in a state of mourning and is seen drinking and eating meat in front of you. You should exile him overseas to correct the morals." King Wen said, "The successor to the throne is so disgraced, and you cannot share my sorrow. What's the point? Besides, drinking and eating meat when one is ill is a mourning custom!" Ji continued to drink and eat, looking calm.
Zeng Zi asked: "When the king leaves the border, he should be guarded for three years and follow the coffin. When the king dies, what should he do when he enters the palace?" Confucius said: "In the common funeral, the son wears hemp, a hat and a sash, a thin mourning, a thin coat, and a stick. Enter from the gate and ascend from the west steps. If it is a small burial, the son takes off his clothes and follows the coffin, enters from the door and ascends from the east steps. The king, the officials and the scholars are the same." Zeng Zi asked: "After the king's funeral is held, what should he do when he hears about the death of his parents?" Confucius said: "Just do it. After the seal is sealed and he returns, he will not wait for you." Zeng Zi asked: "After the parents' funeral is held, when he arrives on the road and hears about the death of the king, what should he do?" Confucius said: "Just do it. After the enfeoffment, he changed his clothes and went.
Wei Junchang was the chief secretary of Duke Wen, and Duke Wen liked him very much. They would always bring wine and dried meat to Wei, and sit cross-legged facing each other all day long. When Wei went to Wen and Xu, it was the same.
Also, the condolence ceremony of the princes is treated as if they were treated as princes. When the lady arrives, she enters from the gate and ascends from the side steps, while the prince is in the east. The rest is the same as the funeral ceremony. The sister-in-law does not caress the uncle, and the uncle does not caress the sister-in-law.
Wang Ziyou went to see Mr. Xie and asked, "What is a seven-character poem?" Ziyou answered, "It is as majestic as a colt that can run a thousand miles, and as light as a duck in the water."
Those who serve in the Grand Secretary of the Imperial Academy shall be seated three seats apart from each other, and may be asked questions. At the end, they shall lean against the wall. If the list of things is not finished, they shall not be asked. In all schools, the spring officials shall offer sacrifices to their ancestors, and the autumn and winter officials shall do the same. All newly established scholars must offer sacrifices to the sages and teachers; and when they do things, they must use money. All offerings must be made in harmony, otherwise it is not necessary for the country. All great music must be played to support the elderly. All those who speak in the suburbs must select the virtuous and gather talents. Some may be promoted by virtue, some by deeds, and some by words. All musical performances are sworn in, waiting for the next talk. If one of the three has achieved it, then he shall be promoted to a higher level, and according to his order, he shall be called a suburban person and kept away. It is the same as Chengjun and taking a title from the upper lord. When a newly established scholar has raised instruments and coins, he shall then offer food without dancing or giving instruments, and then leave. He shall be in the East Sequence, and offer once, without any interjection. Teach the crown prince.
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