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When Duke Wen was first persuaded to ascend the throne by the envoy of Prime Minister Liu, his mother, Cui, insisted on staying, so Jiao broke off his sleeve and left. Even though he was highly respected, his local status was still not higher than others. An imperial edict was issued for each title.
The host personally invites the guests to the door, and the guests follow him. As for the door, the host bows to the guests and the door, and the guests enter by themselves; the distinction between noble and humble is made. Three bows to the steps, three concessions to the guests, bowing to the door, offering, paying, and refusing are complicated. The door is simple. As for the guests ascending to receive, sitting to offer, standing to drink. No toasts and descending; the distinction between high and low is made.
Taifu Xie was the horseman of Duke Huan's company. When Duke Huan went to see Xie, Xie was combing his hair and quickly took out his clothes and hat. Duke Huan said, "Why bother with this?" Then they stayed down and talked until nightfall. After he left, he said to his attendants, "Have you ever seen such a person?"
The princes attacked Qin, and Duke Huan of Cao died at the meeting. The princes asked Han to attack. Duke Xiang of Xiang paid court to Jing, and King Kang died. The people of Jing said, "We must ask for an attack." The people of Lu said, "It is not proper." The people of Jing forced them to do so. The witch brushed the coffin first. The people of Jing regretted it. When Duke Cheng of Teng died, he sent Zishu and Jingshu to offer condolences and present the letter. Zifu and Huibo were the intermediaries. When he went to the suburbs, he was afraid of Yibo and did not go in. Huibo said, "It is a matter of politics. You cannot ignore public affairs for the sake of your uncle's private affairs." So he went in. Duke Ai sent people to offer condolences to Li Shang and met him on the road. He made way for him on the road and drew a palace to receive condolences. Zengzi said: "Li Shang is not as knowledgeable as Qi Liang's wife. When Duke Zhuang of Qi attacked Ju in Duo, Qi Liang died there. His wife met his coffin on the road and cried for him. Duke Zhuang sent people to offer condolences. She replied: "If your ministers are not free from guilt, they will be executed in the market and court, and their wives and concubines will be arrested; if your ministers are free from guilt, they will have the shabby house of their ancestors. Your Majesty will not disgrace your fate."
At first, Xie An lived in Dongshan, wearing commoner clothes. At that time, his brothers had already become rich and powerful, and they gathered at home, becoming a popular figure. Madam Liu jokingly said to An, "Shouldn't a real man be like this?" Xie scratched his nose and said, "I'm afraid I can't avoid it!"
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
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