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Rebirth in the 80s: Don't Be a Saint

Arrogance cannot be allowed to grow excessive, desires cannot be followed, ambitions cannot be satisfied, and happiness cannot be taken to the extreme.

Iron Snow Clouds

Ice Eye

Ziyou asked, “Is it a courtesy to mourn a loving mother as if she were your own mother?” Confucius said, “It is not a courtesy. In ancient times, men had tutors outside and loving mothers inside, and they were appointed by the king to teach their children. Why should they wear mourning clothes? In the past, Duke Zhao of Lu lost his mother when he was young. He had a loving mother who was good. When her mother died, the duke could not bear to mourn her. He wanted to mourn her. The officials reported it to the king, who said, “According to the ancient etiquette, loving mothers should not be mourned. Now you are mourning for her. This is against the ancient etiquette and disrupts the laws of the country. If you carry it out, the officials will write it down and leave it to future generations. Isn’t it wrong!” The duke said, “In ancient times, the emperor wore a silk hat when he was at home. 'The Duke could not bear it, so he wore a white hat to mourn his beloved mother. The practice of mourning a beloved mother began with Duke Zhao of Lu. Zengzi asked, "When the princes meet the emperor, they cannot complete the ceremony when entering the door. How many of them are abolished?" Confucius said, "Four." Please ask. He said, "The great temple is on fire, the sun is eclipsed, the queen's funeral, and the rain soaks the clothes and makes them lose their appearance, then it is abolished. If all the princes are present and the sun is eclipsed, they will follow the emperor to put out the sun, and each will give his own weapons in his own color. If the great temple is on fire, they will follow the emperor to put out the fire, and will not give his own weapons in his own color." Zengzi asked, "When the princes meet, they bow and yield to each other when entering the door, and cannot complete the ceremony. How many of them are abolished?" Confucius said, "Six." Please ask. He said, "When the emperor dies, the great temple is on fire, the sun is eclipsed, the queen's funeral, and the rain soaks the clothes and makes them lose their appearance, then it is abolished." Zengzi asked, "When the emperor has offered sacrifices to the five sacrifices in the suburbs and the altars, the food and utensils have been laid out, and when the emperor dies, what should be done with the queen's funeral?" Confucius said, "Abolished. Zengzi asked, "When the sacrifice is to be made and the sun is eclipsed, and the Taimiao is on fire, what should be done with the sacrifice?" Confucius said, "Just follow the sacrifice. If the animal arrives but has not been killed, it is cancelled. When the emperor dies but has not been buried, the five sacrifices cannot be performed; after the funeral, the sacrifice is performed, the corpse is brought in, the three meals are not served, and the wine is not vinegared. From the opening to the return of the mourning, the five sacrifices cannot be performed; after the burial, the sacrifice is performed, the prayers are finished and the offerings are made." Zengzi asked, "When the princes offer sacrifices to the gods and grain, the sacrificial vessels and dishes are already laid out. What should they do when they hear of the death of the emperor, the mourning of the queen, the death of the king, or the mourning of the lady?" Confucius said, "Abolish it. From the death to the funeral, from the opening to the return of the mourning, they serve the emperor." Zengzi asked, "When the ministers offer sacrifices, the tripods and sacrificial vessels are laid out, and the dishes are set out, but the rituals cannot be completed. How many of them are cancelled?" Confucius said, "Nine. "Please ask. He said: "The death of the emperor, the mourning of the queen, the death of the monarch, the mourning of the lady, the fire of the monarch's grand temple, the solar eclipse, the three-year mourning, the mourning of Qisui and the great merit are all abolished. The mourning of the outside world from Qisui onwards is carried out. The sacrifice of Qisui is that the corpse is brought in, three meals are not served, and the wine is not made with vinegar. The great merit is just a vinegar. The small merit and mourning are just things in the room. The reason why scholars are different is that they do not offer sacrifices in mourning, and they offer sacrifices to the dead without wearing mourning clothes. "

God

To think about the constitution and seek the good is enough to be famous, but not enough to move the masses; to follow the virtuous and understand the distant is enough to move the masses, but not enough to transform the people. If a gentleman wants to transform the people and establish customs, he must learn!

Private life

Therefore, only after the behaviors of filial piety, brotherhood, loyalty and obedience are established, can one be a man; only after being a man can one govern others. Therefore, the sage kings valued etiquette. Therefore, it is said that the cap is the beginning of etiquette and the most important thing for good things. Therefore, the ancients valued the cap; the cap was performed in the temple; the temple was performed to respect things; respect things and dare not take the initiative to do things; do not take the initiative to do things, so they humble themselves and respect the ancestors.

Contract marriage: President, can you do it?

When the wife is about to give birth to a child, and the month is coming, she will live in the side room. The husband will send someone to ask her twice a day. She will get up and ask herself. The wife dare not see her. She will ask her mother to dress and answer. When the child is born, the husband will send someone to ask her twice a day. The husband will not enter the side room when he is ready. When the child is born, men will set up bows on the left side of the door, and women will set up veils on the right side of the door. After three days, they will start to carry the child. Men will shoot women. When the king's heir is born, he will inform the king and receive a large sacrifice. The butler will be in charge of the preparations. After three days, the fortune teller will carry the child. The lucky person will stay outside the bedroom door in the morning clothes. The poet will carry the child and shoot people with mulberry bows and six arrows. Shoot the four directions of heaven and earth. The butler will carry the child. The butler will carry the child and give him a bundle of silk. The fortune teller's wife and the official's concubine will feed the child. Whenever a child is received, a day is chosen. For a child born in the twelfth month, a large sacrifice is given. For common people, a pig is given. For scholars, a pig is given. For officials, a small sacrifice is given. For the prince's son, a large sacrifice is given. For those who are not born in the twelfth month, the sacrifice is reduced by one level. The child is placed in a room in the palace. From the various mothers and suitable ones, the one who is generous, kind, gentle, respectful, cautious and taciturn is selected to be the child's teacher. The next best is the loving mother. The next best is the nanny. They all live in the child's room. Others do not go there unless there is something to do. At the end of March, a day is chosen to cut the hair into a bun. The boy's hair is tied in a corner and the girl's hair is tied in a bun. Otherwise, the boy's hair is tied on the left and the girl's hair is tied on the right. On this day, the wife presents the child to the father. The nobles dress the children. From the officials and below, everyone washes their hair. Men and women get up early, bathe, dress, and prepare food for the first day of the month. The husband enters the room and ascends the steps to the east. He stands in the west of the east. The wife holds the child out of the room and stands in front of the lintel facing east. The mother-in-law said, "Mother, I dare not use the time to see the child." The husband replied, "The emperor has a general." The father held the son's right hand, coughed and named him. The wife replied, "I have written it down." Then he turned his left hand back and gave it to the teacher. The son's teacher told the names of all the wives and mothers, and the wife went to bed. The husband told the name of the prime minister, and the prime minister told the names of all the men. They wrote: "Born on such and such a day in such and such a year." Then they hid it. The prime minister told the village historian. The village historian wrote two books, one of which was hidden in the village government and the other was presented to the state historian. The state historian presented it to the state earl, and the state earl ordered it to be hidden in the state government. The husband went to eat as if he was raising a child. When the prince was born, the king bathed and dressed in court clothes, and the wife did the same. They all stood on the west side of the steps. The wife of the prince held the child and went up from the west steps. The king named him and then went down. When the son and the concubine met in the outer bedroom, they stroked their heads and coughed and named them. The etiquette was the beginning of the general, and there was no remark. In naming a son, one should not use the date or month, state or hidden illness as the name; the son of an official or scholar should not have the same name as the crown prince. When a concubine is about to give birth to a son, and the month and day are up, the husband should have someone ask about it every day. At the end of the third month, the son should wash his head and get ready in the morning, and be seen in the inner bedroom, with the same etiquette as when he first enters the room. After the king has finished eating, he should be allowed to eat before entering the palace. When a son of a duke or a concubine is born, he should go to a concubine's room. At the end of the third month, his mother should bathe and wear court clothes and go to the king. The banished son should go to the king with his son, and the king should give him a name according to the king's gifts. If there are multiple sons, the officials should name them. If a commoner does not have a concubine, and the month and day are up, the husband should go out to live in the group room, and the way he asks about his son should be the same as the way a son goes to his father. When the father is alive, the grandson should go to the grandfather, and the grandfather should also name him, with the same etiquette as a son goes to his father, without any excuse. A son who feeds his son should go out after three years, and if he is seen in the palace of the duke, he should be punished. The son of an official should feed his mother, and the wife of a scholar should raise her son herself. The sons of officials above the rank of a rank and above, and of officials, are to be seen every ten days. When a son of a family is seen before he has eaten, he must hold his right hand. When a son of a concubine is seen after he has eaten, he must touch his head. When a son can eat, he is taught to eat with his right hand. When a son can speak, he is only allowed to hold his right hand, while a son is allowed to hold his right hand. A son is allowed to wear a leather belt, while a daughter is allowed to wear a silk belt. At the age of six, he is taught the numbers and names of the directions. At the age of seven, men and women are not allowed to sit at the same table, nor to eat together. At the age of eight, when they enter and leave the house or eat at a table, they must follow the elders, and they are taught to yield. At the age of nine, they are taught for several days. At the age of ten, they are to go out to a tutor, live and sleep outside, learn to write and calculate, wear a silk jacket or trousers, and learn the etiquette of the young day and night. Please study and understand. At the age of thirteen, they learn music, recite the Book of Songs, and dance the Spoon. When they become children, they dance the Elephant, and learn archery and charioteering. At the age of twenty, they are allowed to wear fur and silk, dance the Great Summer, and practice filial piety and brotherhood. They are knowledgeable but not taught, and stay at home. At the age of thirty, they are allowed to have a wife, and they are allowed to manage male affairs. They are knowledgeable but have no method, and their grandchildren look at their ambitions. At forty, one begins to serve in the government. One must make plans and consider the situation. If one agrees with the way, one must obey. If one disagrees, one must leave. At fifty, one must be appointed as a senior official and serve in the government. At seventy, one must start work. All men worship with the left hand. For a girl who has not been out for ten years, her mother will teach her to be gentle and obedient. She must handle hemp and linen, process silk cocoons, weave ropes, learn women's affairs, share clothes, watch sacrifices, offer wine, food, and pickles, and help with offerings. At fifteen, she comes of age. At twenty, she gets married. If she has a wife, she gets married at twenty-three. If she marries, she becomes a wife. If she runs away, she becomes a concubine. All women worship with the right hand.