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The guests went to Chen Taiqiu to stay overnight, and Taiqiu asked Yuanfang and Jifang to cook. The guest was discussing with Taiqiu, and the two of them brought in fire, both of them were silent and eavesdropping. I forgot to use chopsticks and spatula when cooking, and the rice fell into the pot. Taiqiu asked, "Why don't you cook with steam?" Yuanfang and Jifang knelt down and said, "Your Excellency was talking with a guest, and we were eavesdropping. We forgot to bring chopsticks and a basket when cooking, and now the rice has become porridge." Taiqiu said, "Do you know anything about it?" They replied, "I just remember it." The two men spoke at the same time and took turns to talk, without losing anything. Taiqiu said: "In this case, just eating rice is enough, why do we need rice?"
He Cidao went to the Prime Minister's place. The Prime Minister pointed at the seat with his whisk and called He to sit with him, saying, "Come! Come! This is your seat."
Wang Shuang was drinking with Sima Taifu. The Grand Tutor was drunk and called the king "boy." The king said, "My late grandfather, the Chief Secretary, was a friend of Emperor Jianwen. My late aunt and sister were married and had two concubines. How can they be called boys?"
When a girl is betrothed, she is given a tassel; unless there is a serious reason, she will not enter the bride's house. When aunts, sisters, and daughters return home after getting married, brothers should not sit at the same table with them, nor eat from the same utensils with them. Father and son sit at different tables.
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
When a person dies, he should not be idle for three days, and he should not be relieved for three months. He should be sad for three years, and he should be worried for three years - this is the killing of grace. The sage uses killing to control moderation, and this is why mourning lasts for three years. The wise should not go beyond the limit, and the unworthy should not fail to reach the limit. This is the mean of mourning, and it is what the king always does. The Book of Documents says: "Emperor Gaozong was lenient and did not speak for three years." This is good; all kings should follow this ritual. Why is it good for him alone? It is said: Emperor Gaozong was Wu Ding; Wu Ding was a wise king of the Yin Dynasty. He succeeded the throne and was kind and good at mourning. At this time, the Yin Dynasty declined and revived, and rituals were abolished and revived, so he did it well. Because it was good, it was recorded in the book and praised, so he was called Emperor Gaozong. During the three-year mourning, the king did not speak. The Book of Documents says: "Emperor Gaozong was lenient and did not speak for three years." This is what it means. However, those who say "speaking without culture" refer to the ministers.
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