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Sun Xinggong and Xu Xuandu were both famous figures of the time. Some people respect Xu's noble sentiments and despise his grandson's evil conduct; some people love his grandson's talent and eloquence and have no interest in Xu.
. When parents grow old, they should not change their ways and should not be late. When parents are sick and look pale, this is the filial son's indifference. When a father dies and one cannot read his books, the traces of his hand remain; when a mother dies and one cannot drink from the cup, the traces of her mouth remain.
When Zi Liu's mother died, Zi Shuo asked for a feast. Zi Liu asked, "Why?" Zi Shuo said, "Please give porridge to my half brother's mother." Zi Liu said, "How can you bury your mother with porridge for someone else's mother? No." After the funeral, Zi Shuo wanted to use the remaining cloth to prepare the sacrificial utensils. Zi Liu said, "No, I have heard that a gentleman should not stay at home during a funeral. Please arrange for the poor among your brothers." The gentleman said, "If you plan for someone's military advisor, you will die; if you plan for someone's state, you will be destroyed." Gongshu Wenzi ascended to Xiaqiu, and Qu Boyu followed him. Wenzi said, "How happy this hill is. I want to be buried there when I die." Qu Boyu said, "If you are happy, then Yuan will come forward."
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
In the case of parents' funeral, after the funeral, people cry, and the pillars, lintels and screens are cut, and do not wear sackcloth or bees; after a period of time, a small funeral is held, people live in a whitened room, and sleep on mats; after another period of time, a big funeral is held, people live and sleep again; in the middle of the month, people mourn, and use a bed.
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