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Wang Gongyuan married the daughter of Zhuge Dan. After they entered the room and started talking, the king said to the woman, "You look humble, not like Gong Xiu at all!" The woman said, "A man cannot imitate Yan Yun, but let a woman compare herself to Ying Jie!"
A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
Xun Ciming met Yuan Lang of Runan and asked about the people of Yingchuan. Ciming mentioned his brothers first. Lang laughed and said, "Can a scholar be selected only because of his kinship?" Ciming said, "You are questioning me, what scripture are you basing your opinion on?" Lang said, "I was just asking about the country's scholars, but you mentioned my brothers, so I blame them." Ciming said, "In the past, Qi Xi recommended people from within the country without missing their sons, and recommended people from outside the country without missing their enemies, which was considered to be very fair. The poem of King Wen of Gongdan did not discuss the virtues of Yao and Shun, but praised Wen and Wu, which is the meaning of loving one's relatives. The meaning of the Spring and Autumn Annals is to include one's country within and exclude other countries. Moreover, if one does not love one's relatives but loves others, is it not against virtue?"
When Yin Hongqiao was appointed as the governor of Yuzhang County, before his departure, he left with about a hundred letters. When they reached the stones, they threw them all into the water, and said, "Those who sink will sink, and those who float will float. Yin Hongqiao cannot write a letter."
When Xie E was young, he liked to hold a purple silk sachet and hang it over his hand. The Grand Tutor was worried about it, but did not want to offend him, so he made a bet and burned it as soon as he could.
The meaning of the crown: The crown is made of black cloth. In ancient times, the cloth was black, and the Qi people wore it. As for its tassel, Confucius said: "I have never heard of it. It is better to wear it in a worn-out state." The son wears the crown on the east side to show his generation. The offering in the guest position is to add to the success. The three additions are more respected, which means his aspirations. The crown and the name are to respect the name. The appearance of the crown is the way of Zhou. The Zhangfu is the way of Yin. No pursuit is the way of the Xiahou clan. Zhou Bian, Yin Bian, Xia Shou. The three kings shared the leather cap and white pile. There is no ceremony for the crown of the senior officials, but there is a ceremony for their wedding. In ancient times, people were promoted to the rank of nobility after the age of fifty, so why did the crown ceremony of the senior officials exist? The crown ceremony of the princes was not invented until the end of the Xia Dynasty. The first son of the emperor is a scholar. There is no one in the world who is noble at birth. To establish the princes in succession is to show the virtue. To give people official titles is to kill virtue. To give posthumous titles after death is the present; in ancient times, there was no title when alive and no posthumous title when dead. What is respected in ritual is to respect its meaning. If it loses its meaning, it is the job of the historian to explain its number. Therefore, the number can be explained, but its meaning is difficult to know. Knowing its meaning and respecting it is the way for the emperor to rule the world.
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