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Xie Lingyun liked to wear a hat with a curved handle. The hermit Kong said to him, "If you want to have lofty ambitions, why can't you forget the appearance of the curved hat?" Xie replied, "If you will not be afraid of your shadow, you will not be able to forget it."
When Wang Zijing and his brothers met Duke Xi, they tiptoed to ask for his advice and were very polite to outsiders. When the guests died, they all wore chopsticks and high sandals, and had a disrespectful demeanor. When they were ordered to sit down, they all said, "We are busy and have no time to sit down." After they left, Xi Gong said with deep emotion, "If the distinguished guests were still alive, how dare you rats do this!"
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
Confucian scholars live in a difficult place, sit up and stand respectfully, speak first and be honest, and act uprightly. They do not compete for the benefits of danger and ease on the road, and do not compete for the harmony of yin and yang in winter and summer. They love death and wait for it, and nourish their bodies and do things. They are like this in their preparation.
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