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When judging a person, he must be of the same rank.
Bo Gao died in Wei and went to Confucius. Confucius said: "Why should I cry? For my brothers, I cry in the temple; for my father's friends, I cry outside the temple gate; for my teacher, I cry in the bedroom; for my friends, I cry outside the bedroom door; for my acquaintances, I cry in the wild. In the wild, it is already distant; in the bedroom, it is already important. Since You Ci came to see me, I cried to Ci's family." Then he ordered Zigong to be the host and said: "If you come to cry for you, bow to him; if you know that Bo Gao came, don't bow."
Jia Chong’s ex-wife was the daughter of Li Feng. Feng was executed, and the couple divorced and moved to the border. Later he was pardoned and returned, and Chong had already married Guo's daughter. Emperor Wu specially appointed two ladies on his left and right. Li lived separately and refused to return to the residence. Guo said to Chong, "I want to go to Sheng Li." Chong said, "He is a man of integrity and talent. It is better for you not to go." Guo then showed her dignity and brought many maids with her. When he arrived and entered the house, Li stood up to greet him. Guo didn't realize his legs were bent, so he knelt and bowed again. After returning, he told Chong, who asked, "What can I tell you?"
Xu Yun's wife was the daughter of Ruan Weiwei. She was as virtuous as her sister but extremely ugly. After the formalities were exchanged, Yun refused to continue his talk, and his family members were deeply worried. When a guest arrived in Huiyun, the wife asked her maid to check him out, and she replied, "It's Huan Lang." Huan Lang is Huan Fan. The woman said, "Don't worry, Huan will persuade you to come in." Huan indeed said to Xu, "Since the Ruan family married their ugly daughter to you, they must be interested in you. You should observe it." Xu then went back inside. As soon as he saw the woman, he wanted to leave. The woman realized that after he left, there was no way he would come back, so she grabbed his skirt and stopped him. "Xu Yin said, "A woman has four virtues. How many of them do you have? "The woman said, "The only thing a new bride lacks is your appearance. However, a scholar has a hundred virtues, how many do you have? "Xu Yun: "All are ready." "The woman said: "Virtue is the most important of all virtues. You like lust but not virtue. How can you say you have everything?" "Yun felt ashamed and began to respect him.
Emperor Xiaowu was very close to and respectful of Wang Guobao and Wang Ya. Ya recommended Wang Xun to the emperor, and the emperor wanted to meet him. Once at night, when he was talking with Guo Bao and Ya, the emperor felt a little drunk and lustful, so he ordered Xun to be called. When he was about to arrive, he heard the soldiers' message. Guo Bao knew that he was inferior to Wang Xun in talent and was afraid of losing his favor, so he said, "Wang Xun is a famous person today. Your Majesty should not see him with wine and women. You can issue another edict." The emperor agreed with his words and thought he was loyal, so he did not see Xun.
The kind and gentle are the root of benevolence; the cautious and respectful are the place of benevolence; the generous are the work of benevolence; the generous are the ability of benevolence; the polite are the appearance of benevolence Talking is the expression of benevolence; singing is the harmony of benevolence; dispersing is the application of benevolence; Confucians have all of these, but they still dare not say benevolence. Their respect and humility are like this.
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