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Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
The Master said: 鈥淎 mean man drowns in water, a gentleman drowns in his mouth, and a great man drowns in the people, all because of what they despise. Water is close to people and drowns them; virtue is easy to get close to but difficult to get close to, so it is easy to drown people; talking is tedious and annoying, easy to speak but difficult to regret, so it is easy to drown people; people are closed to people and have contemptuous hearts, they should be respected but not ignored, so they are easy to drown people. Therefore, a gentleman should not be careless. Taijia said: 鈥楧o not go beyond your destiny and overturn yourself; if you are afraid of the trap, go and review your measures and you will be released. 鈥橠ui Ming said: 鈥極nly the mouth causes shame, only armor causes war, only clothes are in the box, and only weapons are used to review one鈥檚 body. 鈥橳aijia said: 鈥楾he evil of heaven can be disobeyed; the evil of oneself cannot be avoided. '"Yin Ji" says: "Yin is the one who respects the heaven, and is seen in Xiyi; Xia has an end since Zhou, and Xiang has also ended. '"
Zilu left Lu and asked Yan Yuan: "What gift do you have for me?" He said: "I have heard that when you leave your country, you should cry at the tomb before leaving; when you return to your country, you should not cry, but open the tomb and enter." He asked Zilu: "What do you do for me?" Zilu said: "I have heard that you should be polite when passing by a tomb, and be submissive when passing by a sacrifice."
When Nangong Jiang's wife's aunt died, the Master taught her to wear her hair in a bun, saying, "Don't follow others, don't follow others. The hairpin is made of hazel, one foot long and eight inches in total."
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