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When a girl is betrothed, she is given a tassel; unless there is a serious reason, she will not enter the bride's house. When aunts, sisters, and daughters return home after getting married, brothers should not sit at the same table with them, nor eat from the same utensils with them. Father and son sit at different tables.
In mourning, one should only look at the deceased but not answer; in mourning of the same age, one should answer but not speak; in mourning of the great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in mourning of the minor merit, one should discuss but not enjoy music. This is the expression of grief in speech.
Confucius said: "After bowing, one should bow his head, which means he is in a state of slackness; after bowing his head, one should bow his head, which means he is in a state of height. During the three-year mourning period, I will follow the one who is in a state of height."
When Zhou Jun was the governor of Andong, he went hunting and encountered a rainstorm, so he passed by Li's family in Runan. The Li family is wealthy, but the man is not around. There was a girl named Luoxiu. Upon hearing that there was a distinguished person outside, she and a maidservant slaughtered pigs and sheep inside and prepared food for dozens of people. They did everything very carefully and no sound of anyone was heard. He secretly observed her and saw a girl with an extraordinary appearance, so Jun asked her to be his concubine. My father and brother don’t allow it. Luoxiu said: "Our family is ruined, why should we cherish a daughter? If she marries into a noble family, it may be of great benefit in the future." Her father and brother agreed. Then the brothers Bo Ren were born. Luo Xiu said to Bo Ren and others: "The reason why I humble myself and serve as a concubine in your family is for the sake of our family. If you don't become a close relative of my family, I will not cherish the rest of my life." Bo Ren and others obeyed her orders. As a result, Li was able to enjoy a good fortune during his lifetime.
There was a man named Zhou Feng in Lu. Duke Ai held a seal and asked to see him, but he said no. The Duke said, "I'll stop!" He sent someone to ask him, "The Yu clan did not show trust to the people, but the people trusted them; the Xia clan did not show respect to the people, but the people respected them. How did they get this from the people?" He replied, "In the ruins and tombs, they did not show grief to the people, but the people mourned; in the altars and ancestral temples, they did not show respect to the people, but the people respected them. The Yin people made an oath, but the people began to rebel; the Zhou people made a meeting, but the people began to doubt. If there is no courtesy, righteousness, loyalty, sincerity and honesty to govern them, even if they are firmly united, will the people not break away?"
Zhang Tianxi was a powerful man in Liangzhou for generations. He went to the capital with his weak strength. Although he was a different species from others in a distant place, he was also a rebellious person among the border people. I heard that there are many talented people in the imperial capital, and I was full of admiration. He was still staying in Zhu, so Sima Zhuo went to visit him. His words and appearance are vulgar and worthless to listen to. Tian Xi's heart is filled with regrets, so he decided to go far away to protect himself. Wang Mi was known for his talent and was recommended to the emperor when he heard of him. When he arrived, Tian Xi saw that he had a clear and elegant demeanor, spoke fluently, and was well-versed in everything from ancient times to the present. He also knew the characters and clans, and there was evidence for all of them. Tian Xi was surprised and convinced.
When Prime Minister Wang crossed the river, he said that he had often talked about Taoism with Pei Chenggong, Ruan Qianli and other wise men by the Luo River. Yang Man said, "I have promised you this a long time ago, why do you need it again?" The king said, "I didn't say I needed it, I just wanted it and it was not available at that time!"
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