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In the court, talk about etiquette, and answer with etiquette when asked about etiquette. At the grand feast, do not ask for divination, and do not be extravagant.
When Xi Jiabin died, his wife's brothers wanted to bring their sister back, but she refused to come. He said: "Even if I cannot live in the same room with Xi Lang, I would rather not be buried in the same grave with him after death!"
The king does not name the concubines of the ministers, the great officials do not name the nephews and daughters of the ministers, and the scholars do not name the concubines of the family. The son of a lord or a minister dare not call himself "my son"; the son of a minister or a scholar dare not call himself "the heir so-and-so", nor dare to have the same name as the heir. If the lord asks a scholar to shoot and he fails, he should excuse himself on the grounds of illness, saying, "I am worried about carrying firewood." It is not polite to serve a gentleman without looking back.
Xiahou Taichu and Chen Benshan of Guangling. Ben and Xuan were feasting in front of Ben's mother. Ben's younger brother Qian came back and went straight in and reached the door of the hall. Taichu then stood up and said, "We can achieve unity, but we cannot mix them."
The mourning period is lived in the hut, and the mourning period is not allowed to go to the hut for the whole mourning period. If the father is still alive, the mother is still alive, and the wife is still alive; if the mourning period is the period of Qisui, and the mourning period of Dagong Busui for nine months, they will not go to the hut for three months. Women do not live in the hut, and do not sleep in the thatched. After the mourning of parents, go home after the mourning; if the period is nine months, go home after the burial. In the case of public mourning, the great officials wait for the mourning, and the scholars cry and go home. When the parents of a senior official or scholar are buried, they should return home after the funeral. On the anniversary of the death of the deceased on the first month of the lunar month, they should return home to mourn in the clan. When the father or brothers are buried, they should return home after the mourning. A father is not inferior to a son, and an elder brother is not inferior to a younger brother.
A son is named not because of his country, not because of the sun and the moon, not because of his hidden illness, not because of the mountains and rivers.
》 says: "Filial sons are not lacking." Confucius said: "To be harmonious with the party of parents can be called filial. Therefore, the gentleman uses harmony to unite the clan." The Book of Songs says: "This makes brothers more than enough; not to be so, brothers will be more friendly."
When Ruan Ji was about to bury his mother, he steamed a fat pig, drank two buckets of wine, and then when he said goodbye, he bluntly said, "I am poor!" They all had to take number one, and because of vomiting blood, they were disabled for a long time.
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