经典荤笑话

Sir, please listen to my orders.

There was a morning auspicious event in Lu, but no one sang. Zilu laughed at him. The Master said, "You, you blame others, and never stop? The three-year mourning period is already long." Zilu left, and the Master said, "How long? If it lasts more than a month, it will be good."

The Cute Wife of the Fifties: The Soldier King is too stuffy!

When the emperor and the princes have nothing to do, they have three fields a year: one for dry beans, two for guests, and three for the king's kitchen. If you do not farm when you have nothing to do, it is disrespectful; if you farm without courtesy, it is a waste of nature. The emperor does not surround the country, and the princes do not hide their flocks. When the emperor is killed, the great chariots are sent down; when the princes are killed, the small chariots are sent down; when the officials are killed, the assistant chariots are stopped. When the assistant chariots are stopped, the people can go hunting. The otter sacrifices fish, and then the hunters go into the marshes. The jackal sacrifices animals, and then they go hunting. The doves transform into eagles, and then they set up nets. When the grass and trees fall, they go into the mountains and forests. When insects are not hibernating, do not burn the fields, do not kill deer, do not lay eggs, do not kill fetuses, do not kill young, and do not cover nests.

Princess Rui

Eternal Hope

In a three-year mourning period, one should bow for mourning; if it is not a three-year mourning period, one should bow for auspicious reasons. In a three-year mourning period, if someone gives wine and meat, one must refuse three times. The host accepts it in mourning clothes. If it is ordered by the king, one dare not refuse, but accept and offer it. The mourner does not give away gifts to others, but if someone gives away gifts, even if it is wine and meat, one should accept it. After the death of the father and younger brothers, it is okay to give gifts to others. The county master said: "In a three-year mourning period, it is like beheading. In a period of mourning period, it is like beheading. "In the three-year mourning period, even if the merits are declining, no condolences are offered, from the princes to the scholars. If there is mourning and you are going to go and cry, you should wear your mourning clothes and go. In the mourning period, the eleventh month is for the mourning, the thirteenth month is for the auspiciousness, and the fifteenth month is for the mourning. The mourning period is for the condolences. After the burial, the great merit condolences, cry and leave, do not listen to the affairs. In the mourning period, before the funeral, condolences are offered to the villagers. Cry and leave, do not listen to the affairs. When the merits are declining, mourning, wait for the affairs but do not attend to the affairs. When the minor merits are worn, attend the affairs but do not follow the etiquette. When they approach each other, they leave the palace and leave. When they bow to each other, they mourn and leave. When they ask each other questions, they leave after the enthronement. When they meet, they cry and leave. Friends, Yu Fu and leave. Condolences, not from the host. Forty people hold the sash: Villagers fifty Those who are 40 years old will cry again, and those who are 40 years old will wait for the filling of the pit.

Pampering Wife

Only the most holy man in the world can be wise and knowledgeable, enough to be in charge; generous and gentle, enough to be tolerant; strong and resolute, enough to be firm; dignified and upright, enough to be respectful; meticulous and discerning, enough to distinguish. He is vast and profound, and he always releases it. He is as vast as the sky, and as deep as the abyss. When he sees it, the people all respect it, when he speaks, the people all believe it, and when he acts, the people all praise it. Therefore, his reputation spreads throughout China and extends to the barbarians. Wherever boats and cars can reach, wherever human power can reach, wherever the sky covers, wherever the earth carries, wherever the sun and the moon shine, wherever frost and dew fall, all living beings respect their parents, so he is said to be in harmony with heaven.

Find a glass husband

When Huan Nanjun was a child, he and his brothers raised geese and fought together. The geese in Nanjun were always inferior to him, and he was very angry. That night he went to the goose pen, took all the brothers' geese and killed them. At dawn, all the family members were frightened, thinking it was a strange thing, and they rode in a white carriage. The cavalry said, "There is nothing to be surprised about. It must be a joke from Nanjun!" When asked, it turned out to be true.