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Someone asked Gu Changkang, "Why don't you compose the poem of Lo Sheng?" He replied, "Why don't you do the voice of an old maid?"
Someone gave Wei Wu a cup of cheese. Wei Wu ate a little and wrote the word "合" on his veil to show it to everyone. No one could understand it. When he came to Yang Xiu, Xiu ate it and said, "You told me to eat only one bite, why should I doubt it?"
Duke Wen liked to speak slowly, while Duke Bian was a man of courtesy and rules. When they reached Yu Gongxu, they had a big fight. Wen started to speak vulgarly, and Yu Gong said slowly: "Taizhen never speaks vulgarly all day long."
When Yu Zhigong was the governor of Jingzhou, he presented a feather fan to Emperor Wu. Emperor Wu suspected that it was an old item. Liu Shao, the imperial attendant, said: "When the cypress beams and clouds are constructed, the craftsmen are first placed under them; when the pipes and strings are playing, the bells and Kui are the first to hear the sounds. Zhigong presented the fan because it was good, not new." Empress Yu heard this and said: "This person should be by the emperor's side."
Someone asked: "Why do those who wear a cap not bare their flesh?" The answer is: The cap is the highest honor, and it is not suitable for the body to bare flesh, so it is replaced by stripping.
Emperor Wu said to He Qiao, "I want to scold Wang Wuzi first, and then give him a title." Qiao said, "Wuzi is handsome and straightforward, I am afraid he cannot be subdued." The emperor then summoned Wuzi and scolded him severely, then asked, "Do you feel ashamed?" Wuzi said, "The rumor of 'a foot of cloth and a bucket of millet' has always been shameful to Your Majesty! Others can make people alienate relatives, but I cannot make people alienate relatives, so I feel ashamed of Your Majesty."
Deng Ai stuttered and called himself "Ai Ai". King Wen of Jin teased him and said, "You say 'Ai Ai', how many Ai are you talking about?" He replied, "Phoenix, Phoenix, so it is one Phoenix."
The ruler rolls up his crown and stands on the east side, while his wife stands in the room with a double-breasted robe. The ruler bares his body to welcome the sacrificial animal at the door; his wife offers a bean basket. The ministers and the great officials praise the king, and the women of the court praise the wives: each of them promotes his duties. When all officials are dismissed from their duties and serve severe punishments, the whole country will be greatly subdued. Therefore, the summer sacrifice, autumn tasting, winter sacrifice, spring festival, autumn review and the big wax are the emperor's sacrifices.
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