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A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
During the funeral of Confucius, two or three disciples all wore mourning clothes and went out. They wore mourning clothes when they were in a group, but not when they went out.
Wang Changshi was ill and his relatives and friends had difficulty communicating. When Lord Lin arrived, the gatekeeper immediately opened the door and said, "There is a stranger at the door. I dare not refuse to open the door." The king laughed and said, "This must be Lord Lin."
Chen Zhongju of Runan and Li Yuanli of Yingchuan discussed their merits and virtues together, but could not decide who was ahead in order. Cai Bojie commented on them, saying: "Chen Zhongju is good at offending superiors, while Li Yuanli is strict in controlling his subordinates. It is difficult to offend superiors, but easy to control subordinates." Zhongju was thus ranked below the three gentlemen, and Yuanli was ranked above the eight talented people.
. When parents grow old, they should not change their ways and should not be late. When parents are sick and look pale, this is the filial son's indifference. When a father dies and one cannot read his books, the traces of his hand remain; when a mother dies and one cannot drink from the cup, the traces of her mouth remain.
Wang Ziyou and Zijing were both seriously ill, but Zijing died first. Ziyou asked his attendants, "Why haven't we heard any news? He is already dead!" He showed no sadness at all when he spoke. They asked for a sedan chair and came to the funeral, but did not cry. Zijing had always loved the zither, so he went straight in and sat on the coffin, took out Zijing's zither and played it. When the strings were out of tune, he threw it to the ground and said, "Zijing! Zijing! Both you and the zither are gone." He was in grief for a long time, and died more than a month later.
People say that "Yu Wenkang is jade in a good year, and Zhigong is grain in a famine year." Yu Jia Lun says that Wen Kang called "Gong is the grain in a famine year, and Yu Changren is the jade in a good year."
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