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Arrogance cannot be allowed to grow excessive, desires cannot be followed, ambitions cannot be satisfied, and happiness cannot be taken to the extreme.
When Xie Gong heard that Yang Sui was good, he sent his regards and asked him to come, but he refused to go. Later, Sui became a doctor of the Imperial College. He met Xie Gong on business, and Xie Gong immediately appointed him as the chief clerk.
Someone asked whether Xie Anshi and Wang Tanzhi were superior to Duke Huan. Duke Huan stopped and was about to speak, then regretted and said, "You like to tell others what they say, so I cannot tell you again."
You won’t feel full if you eat together, and you won’t get your hands wet if you eat together. Do not knead the rice, do not let the rice fall, do not drink it out of the water, do not chew the food, do not gnaw the bones, do not eat fish or meat, and do not throw bones to dogs. Do not hold on to what you have gained, and do not show off your food. Do not use chopsticks to eat rice and millet. Do not spit on the soup, do not make the soup gurgling, do not prick your teeth, and do not swallow fishy food. The guest was eating soup, but the host could not accept it. The guest drank the meat, and the host declined. Moist meat is chewy, but dry meat is not chewy. Do not suck or roast.
The clothes are on the body, but it is not known that they are called "wang". If there is no candle and someone comes later, tell the one who is there. The same is true for the blind. Whenever someone drinks wine and offers it to the host, hold the candle and hold it until it is burnt. The guest gets up and says goodbye, and then give it to others. Hold the candle and do not give way, do not say goodbye, and do not sing. Those who wash and wash their hands and eat and drink should not be angry. If asked, they should answer with their sleeves. Offering sacrifices to others is called "zhifu"; offering sacrifices to oneself and offering food to a gentleman is called "shan"; offering sacrifices to the gentleman is called "gao". Whenever a meal is reported to a gentleman, the host will unfold it and give it to the messenger to the south of the steps on the east side, and face south and bow twice to send it off; when the order is returned, the host will bow again and bow. The ritual: for a large sacrifice, use nine pieces of the left shoulder, arm, and leg of an ox; for a small sacrifice, use seven pieces of the left shoulder of a sheep; for a special pig, use five pieces of the left shoulder of a pig. If the country is not poor, then the chariots will not be carved, the armor will not be woven, the food utensils will not be engraved, the gentlemen will not wear silk shoes, and the horses will not be fed regularly.
The rituals for women are established to make it clear that women are obedient, and they are also explained in order, so that women are required to be obedient. A submissive woman is obedient to her uncles and aunts, and harmonious with the family members; then she is responsible to her husband, and completes the affairs of silk, linen, cloth and silk, and carefully guards the accumulation and storage. Therefore, only when women are obedient can the family be harmonious and orderly; only when the family is harmonious and orderly can the family last long; therefore, the sage kings attach great importance to it.
To think about the constitution and seek the good is enough to be famous, but not enough to move the masses; to follow the virtuous and understand the distant is enough to move the masses, but not enough to transform the people. If a gentleman wants to transform the people and establish customs, he must learn!
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