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When Zilu's sister died, he could have removed his hairpin, but he didn't. Confucius asked, "Why didn't you remove it?" Zilu said, "I have few brothers and sisters, but I can't bear it." Confucius said, "The previous kings established the rituals, and people on the road can't bear it." Zilu heard about it and removed it.

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A gentleman acts according to his position and does not want to go beyond it. If you are rich and noble, behave like a rich and noble person; if you are poor and humble, behave like a poor and humble person; if you are a barbarian, behave like a barbarian; if you are in trouble, behave like a barbarian. A gentleman is content with everything he does. If he is in a high position, he will not bully those below him; if he is in a low position, he will not rely on those above him; if he is upright and does not seek help from others, he will not have any complaints. He will not blame the heaven above him, nor will he blame others below him. Therefore, a gentleman lives in ease and waits for his fate. A villain takes risks and hopes for luck. Confucius said, "Shooting is like a gentleman. If he misses the target, he should look for the reason in himself."

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There was a little boy in Zhongchao whose father was sick, so he begged for medicine. The host asked about his illness, and he said, "I have malaria." The host said, "You are a noble and virtuous gentleman, why do you have malaria?" He replied, "I came to be a gentleman, so I have malaria."

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The one who presents the table and the staff should brush it. The one who imitates a horse or a sheep should lead it with his right hand; the one who imitates a dog should lead it with his left hand. The one who holds a bird should hold it with his left hand. The one who decorates lambs and geese should hold it with a silk cloth. The one who receives pearls and jade should hold it with his hands. The one who receives a bow and sword should hold it with his sleeves. The one who drinks from a jade cup should not wave it. Anyone who asks for a bow, sword, bag, or basket to ask for a favor should hold it as if he were receiving a favor, just like a messenger.

You can't afford to offend this man.

Guo Huai was the governor of Guanzhong. He was very popular among the people and also had many military achievements. Huai's wife was the sister of Grand Commandant Wang Ling, and she should be executed together with Wang Ling for the crime. The envoy's call is very urgent, and the Huai envoy should pack up and set out soon. The civil and military officials of the prefecture as well as the common people urged Huai to raise an army, but Huai refused. When the time came, he sent his wife away, and tens of thousands of people cried and shouted. After walking for dozens of miles, Huai ordered his men to chase the lady back, and then all the civil and military officials rushed forward as if they were protecting their own lives. When he arrived, Huai wrote to Emperor Xuan, saying: "The five sons are in sorrow and miss their mother. If their mother dies, there will be no five sons. If the five sons die, there will be no Huai either." Emperor Xuan responded with a letter and specifically pardoned Huai's wife.