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When Tao Gong was young, he worked as a fish weir official and once offered fish crucibles to his mother as a reward. The mother sealed the fish and gave it to the envoy, and wrote back to rebuke Kan, saying: "You are an official, and you use official goods to pay the bills. Not only is it of no benefit, but it also adds to my worries."
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
The people of Wei believed that turtles were knowledgeable. Chen Ziche died in Wei. His wife and her family's senior officials planned to bury him alive with her. After the plan was finalized, Chen Zikang arrived and told her, "My master is ill and there is no one to take care of him. Please bury him alive with me." Zikang said, "Burying him alive with me is not a courtesy. Even if I do, who should take care of him like my wife and the prime minister? If I have to, I will do it. If I have to, I will let my two sons do it." So he did not do it.
When Shan Xia left Dongyang, Wang Changshi wrote to him to ask for Dongyang's help, saying: "You have inherited the harsh policies, so you can achieve peace and order."
Therefore, the ruler of Lu, in the first month of spring, rides on a large road, carrying a bow and a shawl; the flag has twelve tassels, the pattern of the sun and the moon; he offers sacrifice to the emperor in the suburbs, and is paired with Houji. This is the ritual of the emperor. In the sixth month of the last month of summer, he offers sacrifice to Zhou Gong in the Grand Temple with a sacrifice ceremony, using a white roe as the sacrificial animal; using a sacrificial urn like a sacrificial xiangshan lei; using a yellow-eyed urn; using a jade jar and a large gui as the pouring pot; using a jade bean carved with a bamboo basket; using a jade jar, also carved, with a bi and a bi corner; using a zhu zi as the sacrificial offering; singing "Qingmiao" as the rising song, and playing "Xiang" as the lower song; wearing a red stem and jade qi, and dancing "Dawu" with a crown; wearing a leather hat and a white pile, and dancing "Daxia" with a sash. "Mei" is the music of the Eastern Yi; "Ren" is the music of the Southern Man. Accepting the music of the Yi and Man in the Grand Temple means expanding Lu's influence over the world.
In ancient times, when the princes shot, they had to perform the banquet ceremony first; when the ministers, officials, and scholars shot, they had to perform the village drinking ceremony first. Therefore, the banquet ceremony is to clarify the righteousness between the monarch and his subjects; the village drinking ceremony is to clarify the order of seniority.
Wang and Liu always disrespected Lord Cai. The two men once went to Cai and talked for a long time. Then they asked Cai, "How do you think you compare to Yi Fu?" Cai replied, "I am not as good as Yi Fu." Wang and Liu looked at each other and laughed, saying, "How are you not as good as him?" Cai replied, "Yi Fu is not as good as you!"
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