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Someone asked: "What is a cane?" The answer is: bamboo and tung are the same. So for the father, a cane is made of bamboo; for the mother, a cane is made of tung.
When meeting people, he should not remove mourning clothes, even when he goes to the court of the king. Only the government has to pay taxes and wear mourning clothes. It is said: "A gentleman should not take away people's mourning clothes, nor should he take away their mourning clothes." It is said: "If there are many crimes, the punishment should be five times, and if there are many mourning clothes, the mourning clothes should be five times, and the upper and lower should be attached to each other."
At first, Mars entered Taiwei and then moved to the west of the abandoned Hai. After Jianwen ascended the throne, he entered Taiwei again, which the emperor disliked. At that time, Xi Chao was the Secretary of the Central Secretariat. He summoned Chao and said, "The Mandate of Heaven is short, so there is no need to calculate. Shouldn't the government keep away from recent events?" Chao said, "The Grand Marshal is currently strengthening the borders and protecting the country. He must not have such concerns. I, your Majesty, will guarantee it with my hundreds of people." The emperor then recited a poem by Yu Zhongchu, "Ambitious men grieve over the dangers of the court, loyal ministers mourn over the humiliation of their lord." His voice was very mournful. When Xi was granted leave to return to the east, the emperor said, "I pay my respects to you, my lord. The affairs of our country have come to this point! As a result, I am unable to protect the country with the right principles and to take precautions against potential disasters. I feel deeply ashamed and sighed. How can I express this?" He burst into tears.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When Kong Wenju was ten years old, he went to Luo with his father. At that time, Li Yuanli was famous and served as the Inspector of the Capital Region. Only those with outstanding talents and reputation, as well as those who were his cousins, were allowed to visit him. When Wen Ju arrived at the gate, he said to the clerk, "I am the relative of Lord Li." After being let in, he sat down in front. Yuanli asked, "What is the relationship between you and me?" He replied, "In the past, my ancestor Confucius and your ancestor Boyang had a teacher-student relationship. So you and I have been friends for generations." Yuanli and the guests were all surprised. When Taizhong Daifu Chen Wei arrived later, people told him the same words. Wei said, “A child who is very smart when he is young may not be a good person when he grows up!” Wen Ju said, “I think you must have been very smart when you were young!” Wei was very embarrassed.
He Cidao went to the Prime Minister's place. The Prime Minister pointed at the seat with his whisk and called He to sit with him, saying, "Come! Come! This is your seat."
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