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Yuan Hu was poor when he was young and once worked as a servant carrying rent for others. Xie Zhenxi was traveling by boat. That night the wind was clear and the moon was bright. He heard the sound of passengers reciting poems on a boat on the river bank, which was quite sentimental. The five-character verse he recited was something he had never heard before, and he could not stop admiring it. He immediately sent someone to interrogate him in detail, and it turned out that it was Yuan himself who was reciting the historical poem he had written. Therefore, they wanted each other and were greatly appreciated.
Tanqi originated in the Wei Palace, where people used dressing boxes as a game. Emperor Wen was very good at this play. He used the corner of his hand towel to flick it and every time he did it he hit the target. There was a guest who claimed that he was capable, so the emperor asked him to do it. The guest picked up the chopsticks and held the corner of a hemp scarf, and lowered his head to play the chess pieces, his skill was even greater than that of the emperor.
When Grand Tutor Xi was in Jingkou, he sent his disciples to write to Prime Minister Wang, asking for a son-in-law. The Prime Minister said to Xi Xin: "You can go to the east wing and choose anyone you like." The disciple returned and told Xi Xin: "The young men in the Wang family are all commendable. When they heard that you were looking for a son-in-law, they all behaved politely. Only one young man was lying on the bed with his belly exposed, as if he didn't hear anything." Xi Gong said: "This is exactly what we want!
The Master said: 鈥淎 ruler of a country should make clear what is good and what is bad, so as to show the people kindness, and then the people will not be double-minded. The Book of Songs says: 鈥楤e calm and share your position, and be good at being upright. 鈥欌 The Master said: 鈥淚f the superior is suspicious, the people will be confused; if the subordinate is difficult to know, the ruler will be overworked. Therefore, a ruler who governs the people should make clear what is good to show the people, be careful of what is bad to prevent the people from being licentious, and then the people will not be confused. The ministers should follow the manners, not be heavy-handed, not support what they cannot do, and not bother what they do not know, and then the ruler will not be overworked. The Book of Songs says: 鈥楾he God is strict, and the people are at peace. 鈥 The Xiaoya says: 鈥業t is not that they only share, but that the king is in harmony. 鈥欌
Therefore, only after the behaviors of filial piety, brotherhood, loyalty and obedience are established, can one be a man; only after being a man can one govern others. Therefore, the sage kings valued etiquette. Therefore, it is said that the cap is the beginning of etiquette and the most important thing for good things. Therefore, the ancients valued the cap; the cap was performed in the temple; the temple was performed to respect things; respect things and dare not take the initiative to do things; do not take the initiative to do things, so they humble themselves and respect the ancestors.
Wang Zhonglang loved Zhang Tianxi very much and asked him, "You have seen the paths and tracks of the people who crossed the Yangtze River. What is so great about the tracks on the left side of the Yangtze River? How are the later talents compared with the Central Plains?" Zhang said, "Since Wang and He, we have studied the profound and profound things. We have made changes according to the times, following the style of Xun and Yue." Wang said, "You have more knowledge and insights, why did you let Fu Jian control you?" He replied, "The yang disappears and the yin rests, so the steps of the sky are slow; the negative and positive are stripped away to form an image, so why should we criticize you too much?"
Confucians are knowledgeable but not exhausted, and they practice diligently but not tired; they live in seclusion but not licentious, and they are connected with their superiors but not in trouble; they value harmony in etiquette, the beauty of loyalty and trustworthiness, and the law of leisure. They promote the virtuous and tolerate the masses, and criticize the square and unite the tiles. Their generosity is like this.
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
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