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Whenever Huannan County sees people unhappy, he often says, "You have mourned the pears of the family, should you not eat them again?"
Wang Sizhou went to Yinzhu in Wuxing to have a look. He sighed and said, "Not only does it make people feel more open and clean, but it also makes the sun and the moon seem clearer and brighter."
When Zhao's mother married her daughter off, she warned her daughter before she left, "Be careful not to do good things!" The daughter said, "If I can't do good things, can I do evil things?" The mother said, "If I can't do good things, how can I do evil things?"
Yang Sui's second son, Fu, was a talented young man. He was good friends with Xie Yishou and once went to Xie Yishou early in the morning to pay his respects, but had not yet eaten. Soon Wang Qi and Wang Du came. Since they had not known each other before, the king showed displeasure at the banquet and wanted to ask Yang to leave. The sheep did not look around, but only rested his feet on the table, looking around calmly. After Xie exchanged a few words with Wang, he turned to talk about the appreciation with Yang. Wang then realized what was so special and they joined him in talking. Soon the food was eaten, and the two kings were unable to eat, except for the sheep. The sheep did not respond much, but ate heartily, and then left after eating. Then he tried hard to keep him, but Yang Yi refused to stay and said, "I couldn't obey your order before, and China is still empty." The two kings were the two younger brothers of Xiaobo.
Grand Tutor Xie asked his sons and nephews, "Why do you want to make them good when you are involved in other people's affairs?" No one said anything. The charioteer answered, "It's like wanting orchids and jade trees to grow in the courtyard."
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. 鈥 He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
When Huan Xuan was about to usurp the throne, Huan Xiu wanted to succeed him because Xuan had the permission of his mother. Madam Yu said, "You are close, and you have more years than I do. I have taken care of him, and I cannot bear to see him do such a thing."
When Lady Xie was teaching her son, she asked the tutor, "How come I didn't see you teaching my son for the first time?" The tutor replied, "I always teach my son myself."
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