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Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
Zhang Xuan and Wang Jianwu did not know each other at first, but later they met at Fan Yuzhang's request, and Fan asked them to talk. Zhang Yin was sitting upright with his clothes folded in front of him. Wang Shu looked at him for a long time but could not make any comment. Zhang was greatly disappointed and left. Fan tried to persuade him to stay, but he refused to stay. Fan was Wang's uncle, so he said to Wang: "Zhang Xuan is the most outstanding scholar in Wu. He was also well-known at the time. But he was brought to this point. It is beyond comprehension." Wang laughed and said: "If Zhang Zuxi wants to make his acquaintance, he should come to see him." Fan rushed to inform Zhang, who then packed his belt and went to see him. Then they raised their cups and talked to each other, neither the host nor the guest looked ashamed.
Therefore, if male education is not cultivated, yang affairs cannot be achieved, and it happens to be seen in the sky, the sun is eclipsed; if female obedience is not cultivated, yin affairs cannot be achieved, and it happens to be seen in the sky, the moon is eclipsed. Therefore, when the sun is eclipsed, the emperor wears plain clothes and cultivates the duties of the six officials, and eliminates the yang affairs of the world; when the moon is eclipsed, the queen wears plain clothes and cultivates the duties of the six palaces, and eliminates the yin affairs of the world. Therefore, the emperor and the queen are like the sun and the moon, the yin and the yang, and they need each other to succeed. The emperor cultivates male education, which is the father's way; the queen cultivates female obedience, which is the mother's way. Therefore, it is said that the relationship between the emperor and the empress is like that between a father and his mother. Therefore, to wear mourning clothes for the emperor is the same as to wear mourning clothes for the father; to wear mourning clothes for the empress is the same as to wear mourning clothes for the mother.
Wang Rong and He Qiao suffered a great death at the same time, and both were praised for their filial piety. The king used chicken bones to support his bed, and cried and prepared gifts. Emperor Wu said to Liu Zhongxiong, "Have you visited Wang and He several times? I heard that He was overly sad and distressed, which made people worried." Zhongxiong said, "Although He Qiao was well-dressed, his spirit was not damaged; although Wang Rong was not well-dressed, he was sad and weak. I think He Qiao was filial when he was alive, and Wang Rong was filial when he died. Your Majesty should not worry about Qiao, but worry about Rong."
There was a great historian in Wei named Liu Zhuang who was ill. The Duke said, "If the illness worsens, you must inform me even if you are supposed to offer sacrifices." The Duke bowed twice and asked for the corpse, saying, "There is a minister named Liu Zhuang, who is not my minister, but a minister of the state. I heard that he died, so I will go." He went without taking off his mourning clothes, and then wrapped him up. He gave him the name of the Qiu family in the city and the name of the Pan family in the county, and put it in the coffin, saying, "My descendants will be there for generations, and there will be no change."
Wen Gong mourned his wife, from his aunt Liu family, the family value is chaotic and separated, only a daughter, very beautiful, aunt to be a subordinate to find marriage, the public secretly has the intention of self-marriage, answer Yun: "Good son-in-law is rare, but such as Yu Bi Yun what?" Report Gu Yun: "Has found a wedding place, the door is rough, the son-in-law is famous eunuch, all not reduced." Because the jade mirror stand a piece, the wedding, the girl with her hand covered with a silk fan, stroking her palms laughed and said: "I suspect it is an old slave, if it is like this!"
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