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Confucius said, "Rituals are what the people in the streets indulge in. They make the differences between the people and make them have no suspicion. They serve as rules for the people." Therefore, men and women do not have intercourse without a matchmaker, and do not meet without money, fearing that there will be no difference between men and women. With this, the people in the streets still offer themselves. The Book of Songs says, "How can you cut wood? Without an axe, you cannot do it; how can you marry? Without a matchmaker, you cannot get it; how can you plant hemp? You follow her across the field; how can you marry a wife? You must tell her parents." Confucius said, "Do not marry a wife with the same surname, so as to distinguish them." Therefore, if you do not know the surname of a concubine when buying one, you should consult a fortune teller. Because of this people, the Spring and Autumn Annals of Lu still removed the surname of the lady and called her Wu, and her death was called Mengzi's death. Confucius said: "In the ritual, men and women do not exchange titles except for sacrifices." Because of this people, Yang Hou still killed Mu Hou and stole his wife. Therefore, the ritual of the lady was abolished at the grand feast. Confucius said: "If you don't see the son of a widow, you will not be friends with her. The gentleman keeps a distance from her." Therefore, when making friends, if the host is not at home, you will not enter her house unless there is a major reason. Because of this people, the people still value beauty more than virtue. Confucius said: "Love virtue is like love beauty." The princes did not go below the temptation of beauty. Therefore, the gentleman kept a distance from beauty as a rule for the people. Therefore, men and women do not touch each other. When you touch a woman, you should offer your left hand. If the daughter of a aunt, sister or daughter returns after marriage, men should not sit at the same table with her. A widow should not cry at night. If a woman is sick, you should not ask about her illness. Because of this people, the people are still licentious and chaotic in the clan. Confucius said: "At a wedding, the groom personally welcomes the bride and greets the uncle and aunt. The uncle and aunt pass the bride to the groom, fearing that the matter will go wrong." Because of this, some women still do not attend.

Women's gifts include hazelnuts, dried fruits, dates, and chestnuts.

Zi Zhang asked about politics, and the Master said, "Teacher! Did I tell you before? A gentleman is clear about rites and music, and he only needs to raise and arrange them." Zi Zhang asked again. The Master said, "Teacher, do you think it is necessary to spread the table and the banquet, rise and fall, and offer wine and toast, and then it can be called rites? Do you think it is necessary to carry out the oracle, play the feather flute, and make the bells and drums, and then it can be called music? Speaking and practicing is rite. Acting and enjoying it is music. A gentleman strives for these two things and stands facing south, and this is how the world is peaceful. When the princes came to court, all things were in obedience, and all officials dared not to serve. Where ritual flourishes, the people are governed; where ritual is abolished, the people are in chaos. In a room with a clever eye, there is an outer corner, a seat has upper and lower parts, a car has left and right parts, a person who walks has a following, and a person who stands has an order. This is the ancient meaning. If there is no outer corner in a room, it will be in chaos. If there is no upper and lower part in a seat, it will be in chaos on the seat. If there is no left and right part in a car, it will be in chaos on the car. If there is no following person who walks, it will be in chaos on the road. If there is no order in standing, it will be in chaos in the position. In the past, the sage emperors and wise princes distinguished between the noble and the humble, the old and the young, the near and far, the male and the female, the outside and the inside, and no one dared to cross the road. They all came out from this road. "The three sons, after hearing this from the Master, were as clear as if they had just opened their eyes.




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