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If the eldest son is given a stick, his son will not take the position with the stick. For a wife, if the parents are alive, do not use a stick, do not bow the head. If the mother is alive, do not bow the head. Bowing the head means bowing in the gift. If you disobey the senior official of the princes, you will not return to wear clothes.
Sun Xinggong wrote a eulogy for Yu Gong, which contained many words of concern. When it was completed, he showed it to Yu Daoen. When Yu saw it, he sent it back with emotion, saying, "My ancestors and you would never have come to this."
Gu Mengzhu once offered wine to Zhou Boren, but Boren refused to accept it. Gu Yinyi persuaded Zhu and said to Zhu, "How can you become a pillar of society just by yourself?" Zhou was delighted and they became confidants.
Zilu asked about strength, and the Master said: "Is it the strength of the South? Is it the strength of the North? Is it the strength of suppression? To teach with kindness and gentleness, and not to retaliate against the unrighteous, is the strength of the South, and the gentleman lives in it. Wearing armor and not being tired of dying, is the strength of the North, and the strong live in it. Therefore, the gentleman is harmonious but not swayed, how strong and correct! To stand in the middle but not lean, how strong and correct! If the country has the way, do not change and block it, how strong and correct! If the country has no way, do not change until death, how strong and correct! "
When it is sent away, it is eager and anxious, as if it is chasing but cannot catch up; when it is returned, it is anxious and anxious, as if it is seeking but cannot get. Therefore, when they go to see him off, they seem to be longing for him, and when they return, they seem to be suspicious of him.
Zeng Zi asked: "What should be done if there is a funeral? What comes first and what comes later?" Confucius said: "In the funeral, the light is first and then the heavy; the offering is first and then the light; it is a ritual. From the beginning to the funeral, there is no offering, and there is no mourning during the funeral; after the funeral, there is an offering, and then say goodbye to the funeral, and then do the funeral. The funeral is first heavy and then light, which is a ritual." Confucius said: "Even if the son of the clan is seventy, there is no one without a mistress; if he is not a son of the clan, it is okay even if he has no mistress."
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