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When Yuan Shao was young, he sent people to throw Wei Wu with a sword at night.
In all the etiquette of servants, they must give the servants the reins. If the servant is of a lower rank, then accept it; otherwise, then refuse. If the servant is of a lower rank, then stroke the servant's hand; otherwise, then hold him down. The carriage of guests does not enter the main gate. Women do not stand up to ride. Dogs and horses do not enter the hall. Therefore, gentlemen should wear yellow hair, lower than the rank of ministers, do not gallop when entering the country, and must bow when entering the village.
At nightfall at the tomb of Emperor Xiaowu, Wang Xiaobo came to the tomb and told his brothers: "Although the rafters and beams are new, they still bring with them the sorrow of the lost generations!"
When the princes send out their wives, the wives will come to their country with the etiquette of wives; when they arrive, they will enter with wives. The messenger was about to order, saying, "My lord is incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I have sent my envoy to report this to the steward." The host replied, "My lord has already refused to teach me before. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The officials laid out the utensils; the host's officials also received them. When the wife left, the husband sent someone to bring her back, saying, "I am incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The host replied, "My son is unfilial. I dare not avoid punishment. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The messenger withdrew, and the host bowed to see him off. If the uncle is alive, he should be called uncle; if the uncle is dead, he should be called brother; if there is no brother, he should be called husband. The host's resignation was, "My son is unfilial." If they were aunts or sisters, they would also be called.
Xi Sikong was in the Northern Palace, and Huan Xuanwu disliked him for holding military power. Xi was always in the dark about the situation, so he sent a letter to Huan: "I want to help the royal family and repair the gardens and tombs." The crown prince Jiabin was on a journey. When he heard the letter on the road, he hurriedly took the letter, read it, and found it was torn into pieces, so he returned. He also wrote a letter, explaining that he was old and sick, and could not bear the idleness of others, so he wanted to ask for some vacant land to support himself. Xuanwu was overjoyed when he received the letter, and immediately ordered the transfer of the Duke to supervise five counties and be the prefect of Kuaiji.
The Duke said, “Why don’t gentlemen today practice this?” Confucius said, “Gentlemen today are insatiable in their love of goods, untiring in their indulgence of virtue, idle and arrogant, and are sure to destroy the people. They use the people at noon to attack those who have the Way; they seek what they want, not what they should. In the past, people were used from the front, but now people are used from the back. Gentlemen today do not practice etiquette.”
The kind and gentle are the root of benevolence; the cautious and respectful are the place of benevolence; the generous are the work of benevolence; the generous are the ability of benevolence; the polite are the appearance of benevolence Talking is the expression of benevolence; singing is the harmony of benevolence; dispersing is the application of benevolence; Confucians have all of these, but they still dare not say benevolence. Their respect and humility are like this.
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