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An old friend of Confucius was Yuanrang. When his mother died, Confucius helped her wash the coffin. Yuanrang climbed a tree and said, "It has been a long time since I have trusted music." The song went, "The spotted head of a raccoon, holding the curled hand of a woman." Confucius passed by as someone who did not hear it. The follower said, "Can't you stop?" Confucius said, "I have heard that relatives should not lose their relatives, and the old ones should not lose their old ones."
When Taifu Xie had not yet come of age and had just left for the west, he went to see Changshi Wang and had a long and clear conversation with him. After he left, Gou Zi asked, "How respectful is Xiangke?" The chief secretary said, "Xiangke is so noisy that he is coming to force people."
Bian Wenli lost his composure when meeting Yuan Fenggao. Feng Gao said, "When Emperor Yao invited Xu You, he showed no shame. Why are you wearing your clothes upside down?" Wen Li replied, "Your Excellency has just arrived, and Emperor Yao's virtue is not yet well known, so the lowly people are wearing their clothes upside down."
Therefore, the teaching of ritual is subtle, and it can stop evil before it takes shape, making people move towards good and stay away from crimes without knowing it. That is why the ancient kings respected it. The Book of Changes says: "A gentleman should be cautious at the beginning, and the error of a millimeter will lead to a thousand miles." This is what it means.
When Shi Liu’s mother died, the minister was on the left. When Shi Liu died, his followers were on the right. The minister was on the right because Shi Liu’s followers did it.
Wang Hun's wife, Ms. Zhong, gave birth to a daughter, Lingshu. Wu Zi sought a beautiful and simple match for his sister but failed. There was a military son who was very talented. Wu Zi wanted to marry his sister to him, so he told his mother, "If he is truly talented, I can leave his land to him, but you have to let me see him." Wu Zi then let the soldier's son live with the other children and asked his mother to observe him from behind the curtain. Afterwards, his mother said to Wu Zi, "The one who wears clothes like this, is he the one you wanted to marry?" Wu Zi said, "Yes." His mother said, "This person has the talent to stand out, but the land is cold and he won't live long, so he can't make full use of his talent. Judging from his appearance and bones, he will not live long, so you shouldn't marry him." Wu Zi agreed. Bing'er died a few years later.
During the funeral of Gongyi Zhongzi, Tan Gong was exempted. Zhongzi abandoned his grandson and established his son. Tan Gong said, "Where is it? I have never heard of it before." He hurried to Zifu Bozi at the right of the door and said, "Zhongzi abandoned his grandson and established his son. Why?" Bozi said, "Zhongzi is also following the ancient way. In the past, King Wen abandoned Bo Yikao and established King Wu, and Weizi abandoned his grandson Xu and established Yan. Zhongzi is also following the ancient way."
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