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When the duke mourns, the leaders of all high-ranking officials should use sticks.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
The King of Liang and the King of Zhao were close relatives of the country and were highly respected at the time. Duke Pei Ling asked the two countries to pay millions of yuan in rent every year to help the poor among his relatives. Someone ridiculed him and said, "Why do you beg for things to do good?" Pei said, "To take away from the surplus and give to the deficiency is the way of heaven."
Fan Xuanping was a man, good at wisdom, and sometimes lost the official position in Dongyang, Huan Da Sima was in Nanzhou, so he went to voteChang Qing. "When Fan Cai sat down, Huan thanked him for coming from afar. Although Fan really wanted to submit to Huan, he was afraid that he would damage his reputation by following the trend, so he said, "Although I miss my ancestors, I have a dead son buried here, so I came to visit him. "Huan was disappointed and stood there in vain, and all was lost for a moment.
Pao: take a pig, cut it up, fill it with dates, weave it with weeds, apply it with careful coating, fry it, and dry the coating, split it, wash your hands and rub it, remove the wrinkles, make rice flour and urine to make wine, add it to the pig to fry the fat, and the fat must be burned. Boil it in a large pot and put dried tangerines in a small pot. Make sure the pot does not burn. Do not turn off the fire for three days and three nights, and then season it with acid and meat.
Emperor Wu said to He Qiao, "I want to scold Wang Wuzi first, and then give him a title." Qiao said, "Wuzi is handsome and straightforward, I am afraid he cannot be subdued." The emperor then summoned Wuzi and scolded him severely, then asked, "Do you feel ashamed?" Wuzi said, "The rumor of 'a foot of cloth and a bucket of millet' has always been shameful to Your Majesty! Others can make people alienate relatives, but I cannot make people alienate relatives, so I feel ashamed of Your Majesty."
When Xi Jiabin died, his wife's brothers wanted to bring their sister back, but she refused to come. He said: "Even if I cannot live in the same room with Xi Lang, I would rather not be buried in the same grave with him after death!"
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