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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
The Master said: "The moderation is the highest! Few people can keep it for long!"
When Wen Bo died, Jing Jiang sat on his bed without crying, saying, "In the past, I had Si Zi, and I thought he would be a wise man, so I never went to the public office; now when he died, none of my friends and ministers shed tears, but the women in the house all cried loudly. Si Zi must have been very unruly!" When Ji Kangzi's mother died, he laid out his underwear. Jing Jiang said, "A woman who does not wear clothes dare not meet her parents-in-law. There will be guests from all over the world coming. Why should she display her underwear here?" She ordered to remove it.
When Xie Gong's fellow disciples gathered together, he asked Mao which line of poetry was the best? E Cheng said, "When I went there in the past, the willows were swaying; when I come back now, it is raining and snowing." The Duke said, "The destiny is determined by careful planning, and the distant plans are announced in due course." He said that this sentence has the profound meaning of an elegant person.
After General Wang died, Wang Ying wanted to join the worldly Confucian scholars, who were in charge of Jiangzhou. Wang Han wanted to surrender to Wang Shu, who was in charge of Jingzhou. Han said to Ying, "What is the relationship between the general and Jiangzhou? And you want to return there?" Ying said, "That's why I should go. When the people of Jiangzhou were strong, they were able to resist the opposition, which is not what ordinary people do. But when they see the decline and danger, they will surely be moved. How can Wen, the governor of Jingzhou, act according to your will?" Han refused, and they all surrendered to Shu. Shu Guosan and his son were drowned in the river. When Bin heard that he should come, he secretly prepared a boat to wait for him. But in fact he could not come, and he was deeply angry.
Zhongni said: "The gentleman is moderate, the villain is the opposite of the moderate. The gentleman's moderation is the gentleman who is moderate at times; the villain's moderation is the villain who is unscrupulous."
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