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Therefore, a gentleman should be cautious and not lose his face in front of others. The king should be polite, and the ministers should be inferior to him. The ministers should be polite, and the scholars should be inferior to him. Etiquette should not be given to common people, and punishment should not be given to ministers. Punishers should not be at the king's side.
Yu Xiaofu was the Minister of the Imperial Secretariat of Emperor Wu of Han. The emperor asked him calmly, "I have never heard of you making any offerings while you were my retainer." Yu's home was in Fuchun, near the sea. He told the emperor that he was looking forward to his spirit. He replied, "The weather is still warm. Fish and shrimps (Yu Qiang) cannot be brought in yet. I will make an offering to you soon." The emperor clapped his hands and laughed.
Zi You asked about funeral supplies, and Confucius said, "It is called the family's death." Zi You said, "If there is a death, how can it be prepared?" Confucius said, "If there is a death, don't go too far. If the body is dead, put the head and body together, return to the burial, hang the coffin and seal it, who will criticize it!" Si Shi Ben told Zi You, "Please cover the bed." Zi You said, "Yes." Xianzi heard it and said, "How rude Shu Shi is! He only gives people etiquette."
Chen Shuo was an official of the general and was highly loved and respected. When he died, Guo Pu went to mourn for him, expressing great sorrow, and called out, "Successor, how could you have known that this was not a blessing!" Soon after, the general rebelled, just as he had said.
When Emperor Wu was about to lecture on the Book of Filial Piety, Xie Gong and his brothers had the lecture in private with others. Che Wuzi was very reluctant to ask for thanks, so he said to Yuan Yang, "If I don't ask, my good reputation will be missed; if I ask too much, I will have to thank you twice." Yuan Yang said, "I don't think so." Che asked, "How do you know?" Yuan Yang said, "Have you ever seen a bright mirror get tired of reflecting too many times, or a clear stream get scared of a benevolent breeze?"
Zisi said: "After three days of mourning, the coffin should be buried. Everything attached to the body must be sincere and trustworthy, and there should be no regrets. After three months, the coffin should be buried. Everything attached to the coffin must be sincere and trustworthy, and there should be no regrets. Three years of mourning is the limit, and once a person dies, he will not forget it. Therefore, a gentleman has a lifetime of worries, but no worries of one day. Therefore, he does not rejoice on the anniversary of his death."
The king offered five sacrifices to the deceased: the son, the grandson, the great-grandson, the great-great-grandson, and the great-great-grandson. The princes offered three sacrifices, the officials offered two sacrifices, and the suitable scholars and common people offered sacrifices to their sons.
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