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Zeng Zi asked: "What should be done if there is a funeral? What comes first and what comes later?" Confucius said: "In the funeral, the light is first and then the heavy; the offering is first and then the light; it is a ritual. From the beginning to the funeral, there is no offering, and there is no mourning during the funeral; after the funeral, there is an offering, and then say goodbye to the funeral, and then do the funeral. The funeral is first heavy and then light, which is a ritual." Confucius said: "Even if the son of the clan is seventy, there is no one without a mistress; if he is not a son of the clan, it is okay even if he has no mistress."
When the husband of an aunt or sister dies, and there are no brothers in the husband's party, let the husband's family members take charge of the funeral. The wife's party, even if they are close, do not take charge. If the husband has no family, then the front and back families, the east and west families; if there is none, then the village Yin will take charge. Some say: take charge, and attach to the husband's party.
When Kong Rong was arrested, people at home and abroad were in panic. At that time, the oldest of Rong'er was nine years old and the youngest was eight years old. The two boys were playing with the nails on purpose, without any sign of panic. Rong said to the messenger, "I hope the crime is limited to myself. Can the two sons be saved?" The son came forward slowly and said, "My lord, have you ever seen eggs intact under an overturned nest?" Soon they were also captured.
The sacrifice to the king's father is called Huangzukao, and the king's mother is called Huangzubi. The father is called Huangkao, and the mother is called Huangbi. The husband is called Huangbi. When alive, they are called father, mother, and wife. When dead, they are called father, mother-in-law, and concubine.
Luo Junzhang was once at someone's house, and the host asked him to talk with the guests. He replied, "We have known each other for a long time, so I don't need to bother you again."
Xun Jubo saw his friend sick from afar, when the Hu bandits attacked the county, his friend said to Jubo, "I am dying now, you can go!" Jubo said, "I came from afar to see you, and you asked me to go. It is not the way for Xun Jubo to destroy righteousness to save life?" When the bandits arrived, they said to Jubo, "The army is here, and the whole county is empty. Who are you, a man, and how dare you stay alone?" Jubo said, "My friend is sick, and I cannot bear to leave him. I would rather die with my own body." The bandits said to each other, "We are unrighteous people, and we have entered a righteous country!" So they organized the army and returned, and the whole county was saved.
A filial son will not obey the dark, will not take on dangerous tasks, for fear of humiliating his parents. While parents are alive, do not allow friends to die. No private property.
Zigong asked Confucius, "May I ask why gentlemen value jade and despise enamel? Is it because jade is scarce and enamel is plentiful?" Confucius said, "It is not because enamel is plentiful that they despise it, but because jade is scarce that they value it. In the past, gentlemen compared virtues to jade: warm and moist, it is benevolence; meticulous and fine, it is knowledge; incorruptible but not sharp, it is righteousness; hanging like a string, it is courtesy; knocking, the sound is clear and long, and it bends at the end, it is music; flaws do not cover the beauty, and beauty does not cover the flaws, it is loyalty; trustworthiness is everywhere, it is trustworthiness; aura is like a white rainbow, it is heaven; spirit is seen in mountains and rivers, it is earth; jade is outstanding, it is virtue. What is valued by all in the world is the Tao. The Book of Songs says, 'When I think of a gentleman, he is as warm as jade.' Therefore, gentlemen value it."
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