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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
The Master said: "King Wu and Duke Zhou, how filial they are! A filial person is good at carrying on the will of others, and is good at It is the one who tells people's affairs. In the spring and autumn, the ancestral temple is repaired, the ancestral utensils are displayed, the clothes are set, and the food is offered. The rituals of the ancestral temple are used to sort the ancestors. The order of ranks is used to distinguish the noble and the humble. The order of things is used to distinguish the virtuous. The lower is rewarded as the superior, so as to catch the humble. The feathers of swallows are used to sort the ages. To fulfill one's position, perform the rituals, play the music, respect the respected, love the loved, treat the dead as if they were alive, and treat the deceased as if they were alive, is the ultimate filial piety. The rituals of the suburbs and the community are used to serve the God. The rituals of the ancestral temple are used to worship one's ancestors. If you understand the rituals of the suburbs and the community, and the meaning of the sacrifices, governing the country will be as easy as showing it in your palm! "
When the king and the official are about to bury the deceased, they should offer condolences in the palace; when they leave, they should order the officials to lead the mourners, but they should stop after three steps. After three times, the king will leave; they should do the same in the morning and at the funeral. Those who are fifty years old and do not have carriages should not cross the border to offer condolences.
Chen Zhongju of Runan and Li Yuanli of Yingchuan discussed their merits and virtues together, but could not decide who was ahead in order. Cai Bojie commented on them, saying: "Chen Zhongju is good at offending superiors, while Li Yuanli is strict in controlling his subordinates. It is difficult to offend superiors, but easy to control subordinates." Zhongju was thus ranked below the three gentlemen, and Yuanli was ranked above the eight talented people.
When Wen Taizhen was not yet in a high position, she often played Chupu with appraisers from Yangzhou and Huaizhong, and she never competed with them. Once he made a mistake, he lost a lot of things and was humiliated, with no way to return. He was on good terms with Yu Liang, and shouted to Liang in the boat, "Can you redeem me?" Yu immediately sent him money, and he was able to return. After these four.
Yin Zhongjun asked: "People naturally have no intention of accepting the offer. Why are there so few righteous people and so many evil people?" No one said anything. Liu Yin replied, “It is like writing water on the ground. It flows freely in all directions without any square or round shape.” He was amazed at the moment and thought that his name was well-known.
When the Grand Tutor, Prince Donghai, was stationed in Xuchang, he appointed Wang Anqi as the secretary and military officer, and they had a good relationship and respected each other. He ordered the Crown Prince Pi, saying, "The benefits of learning are shallow, while the comfort of the body is profound. It is better to observe the etiquette and manners carefully than to practice them casually. It is better to receive the emperor's will in person than to savor his words. General Wang is the model of human relations, you should learn from him!" Someone said, "General Wang, Zhao and Deng are the models of human relations, you should learn from them!" He was referring to Anqi, Deng Bodao and Zhao Mu. Yuan Hong wrote the Biography of Famous Scholars and mentioned Wang Canjun. Some say that the Zhao family still has this copy.
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