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Confucians have the same aspirations and the same principles. They are happy to be together and never get tired of each other. They do not believe rumors when they have not seen each other for a long time. They act according to their principles and establish righteousness. They advance when they are together and retreat when they are different. This is their friendship.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
If jade is not polished, it will not become a tool; if people do not learn, they will not know. Therefore, the ancient kings who established the country and ruled the people put teaching first. "The Book of Changes" says: "Remember the beginning and the end and learn." Is this what it means!
Chen Zhongju of Runan and Li Yuanli of Yingchuan discussed their merits and virtues together, but could not decide who was ahead in order. Cai Bojie commented on them, saying: "Chen Zhongju is good at offending superiors, while Li Yuanli is strict in controlling his subordinates. It is difficult to offend superiors, but easy to control subordinates." Zhongju was thus ranked below the three gentlemen, and Yuanli was ranked above the eight talented people.
Xie Gong once went west with Xie Wan and passed by Wu County. A Wan wanted to go with Wang Tianxu, but the Taifu said, "I'm afraid he won't have to repay you, so he's not interested!" Wan still insisted, but the Taifu refused to change his mind, so Wan went alone. After sitting for a while, the king came in and thanked him with a very pleased look, thinking that he was being treated well. After a long time, he came out with his hair dishevelled, and did not sit down. He still sat on the couch in the middle of the courtyard, drying his hair in the sun, with an arrogant look on his face, and no intention of responding to the conversation. After thanking him, he returned. Before reaching the boat, he called out to the Grand Tutor. An said: "Achi will not do that!"
The so-called peace in the world is to govern the country, when the ruler respects the elders, the people will be filial, when the ruler respects the elders, the people will be younger brothers, when the ruler cares for the orphans, the people will not betray him, so the gentleman has the way of the square. What you hate in the superior, do not use it to command the inferior, what you hate in the inferior, do not use it to serve the superior; what you hate in the front, do not use it before and after; what you hate in the back, do not use it to follow the front; what you hate in the right, do not use it to associate with the left; what you hate in the left, do not use it to associate with the right; this is called the way of the square. The Book of Songs says: "The happy gentleman is the parent of the people." What the people like, he likes, and what the people hate, he hates. This is called the parent of the people. The Book of Songs says: "The southern mountain is rocky. The great teacher Yin, the people look up to you." Those who have a country must be cautious, otherwise they will be humiliated by the world. The Book of Songs says: "Before the Yin lost its teacher, it could match the God. Yi Jian was in Yin, and the strict mandate was not changed. "If you win the support of the people, you will win the country; if you lose the support of the people, you will lose the country.
Li Hongdu often sighed that he was not appreciated. Yin Yangzhou knew that his family was poor and asked, "Can you bend your will and travel a hundred miles?" Li replied, "The sigh of the North Gate has long been heard by my friends. A poor ape rushes to the forest, how can it have time to choose a tree!" He was then granted Shan County.
The Xia Hou clan preferred black; for major funerals, the dusk was used, and for military affairs, the black horse was used for riding, and the black horse was used for sacrifice. The Yin people preferred white; for major funerals, the sun was at noon, and the Han was used for military affairs, and the white horse was used for sacrifice. The Zhou people preferred red; for major funerals, the sunrise was used, and the horse was used for military affairs, and the red horse was used for sacrifice.
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