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When Zigong asked about mourning, Confucius said, "Respect is the best, grief is the next, and thinness is the worst. The color of the face reflects the feelings; the sorrowful expression reflects the clothes." When asked about the mourning of brothers, Confucius said, "The mourning of brothers is recorded in the books and strategies. "A gentleman does not take away the mourning of others, nor should he take away his own mourning. Confucius said: "Shaolian and Dalian are good at mourning. They do not get tired for three days and do not stop for three months. They are sad for a long time and worried for three years. They are the sons of Dongyi. ”
Wang Changshi said: "Liu Yin knows me better than I know myself."
Kong Tingwei gave the fur coat to his cousin Chen, but Chen refused to accept it. The Chief Justice said, "Yan Pingzhong was so frugal that he offered sacrifices to his ancestors. He wore a pig's shoulder that was not enough to cover his bowl, and he also wore a fox fur coat for decades. Why do you refuse this?" So he accepted it and wore it.
Zixia lost his son and lost his sight. Zengzi expressed his condolences and said, "I have heard that when a friend loses his eyesight, he should cry for him." Zengzi cried, and Zixia also cried, saying, "Oh, God! I am innocent." Zengzi said angrily, "Shang, how can you be innocent? I served the Master with you between the Zhu and Si Rivers, and retired to live on the Xihe River until I was old. The people of the Xihe River suspected you of the Master, which was your first sin; you lost your parents, and the people did not know about it, which was your second sin; you lost your son and your eyesight, which was your third sin. And you said you were innocent!" Zixia threw his staff and bowed, saying, "I was wrong! I was wrong! I have been living alone for a long time."
Men and women do not sit together, use the same shackles and towels, or combs, and are not taught in person. The sisters-in-law and uncles do not ask about each other, and the mothers do not wash their clothes. External words do not enter the bundle, and internal words do not leave the bundle.
In the battle at Lang, Gongshu Yu met a man who came to the rescue with a stick on his back and said, "Even if he is sick and the responsibility is heavy, a gentleman cannot make plans, and a scholar cannot die. No! I have already said it." He and his neighbor Tong Wangji went there, and they all died there. The people of Lu wanted to avoid the death of Tong Wangji, so they asked Zhongni. Zhongni said: "If you can take up arms to defend the state, even if you don't want to die, isn't it good?"
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