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Grand Tutor Xie asked the chief clerk Lu Tui, "Why did Zhang Ping write a eulogy for his mother but not for his father?" Tui replied, "It is because a man's virtue is shown in his deeds, and a woman's beauty cannot be revealed without a eulogy."
Emperor Wu of Jin always gave tribute to Shan Tao and Shan Shao. Xie Taifu asked his sons and daughters about this, and the cavalry replied, "It should be because those who want it are not many, and those who give it will forget about it."
Dai Andao’s portrait paintings in his middle age were very exquisite. Yu Daoji read it and said to Dai Yun: "The gods are too vulgar, because you have not yet fully understood worldly affairs." Dai Yun: "Only Wu Guang should stop you from saying this."
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
Sun Xiu hated Shi Chong for not giving Lu Zhu to her, and also regretted that Pan Yue did not treat her with courtesy in the past. Later, Xiu became the Minister of the Central Secretariat. Yue saw him in the palace and called out to him, "Mr. Sun, do you remember what happened in the past?" Xiu said, "I kept it in my heart. How could I forget it?" Yue then realized that he would not be able to escape. Later, Shi Chong and Ouyang Jianshi were captured, and Yue was captured on the same day. Shi was sent to the market first, but they didn't know each other either. When Pan arrived later, Shi said to Pan, "Anren, are you the same as him?" Pan said, "It can be said that 'we will share the same home when we are old'." Pan Jingu collected a poem and said, "I entrust my fate to my friend Shi, and we will share the same home when we are old." This is how the prophecy came true.
When the father is in mourning, the sons in the palace cannot participate in the music. When the mother is in mourning, If the sound is heard, do not play music. If the wife is in mourning, do not play music beside her. When a great achievement is about to come, set aside the zither and the harp. When a small achievement comes, do not stop the music.
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