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When serving food to elders, if the host serves the food personally, then one should bow before eating; if the host does not serve the food personally, then one should eat without bowing.
Confucius said: "In bad years, ride a slow horse. Sacrifice with the lower sacrifice."
When Pei Lang wrote "Yu Lin" (Words in the Forest), it was widely known far and wide when it first came out. At that time, young people all copied it and each had one. It is recorded that Wang Dongting wrote a poem "Presented to the King's Drunken Master" which was very talented and sentimental.
When the princes send out their wives, the wives will come to their country with the etiquette of wives; when they arrive, they will enter with wives. The messenger was about to order, saying, "My lord is incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I have sent my envoy to report this to the steward." The host replied, "My lord has already refused to teach me before. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The officials laid out the utensils; the host's officials also received them. When the wife left, the husband sent someone to bring her back, saying, "I am incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The host replied, "My son is unfilial. I dare not avoid punishment. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The messenger withdrew, and the host bowed to see him off. If the uncle is alive, he should be called uncle; if the uncle is dead, he should be called brother; if there is no brother, he should be called husband. The host's resignation was, "My son is unfilial." If they were aunts or sisters, they would also be called.
Yu Daoji said: "Although Lian Po and Lin Xiangru have been dead for thousands of years, they are still alive. Although Cao Tu and Li Zhi are still alive, they are as sad as the dead in the underworld. If everyone is like this, they can be ruled by tying ropes, but I am afraid that foxes and raccoons will eat them all."
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