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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When a relative dies, the chickens and the chickens go barefoot, hold the upper hem, and cry with their hands. The heart of pity and the intention of pain and illness hurt the kidneys, dry the liver and burn the lungs. Water and liquid cannot enter the mouth. No fire is lit for three days, so the neighbors make porridge for him to eat and drink. The grief is in the heart, so the body changes on the outside. The pain and illness are in the heart, so the mouth does not taste good and the body is not comfortable.
The enemy of the father will not live under the same sky with him. The enemy of the brother will not fight back. Friends are from different countries. There are many fortifications in the suburbs, which is a disgrace to the nobles. The land is vast, but it is uncultivated, which is also a disgrace to the scholars.
The wild of the herds was an important matter for King Wu. After the matter was over, he retired, offered firewood to the God of Heaven, prayed to the community, and set up sacrifices in the herdsman's room. Then he led the princes of the world, holding the bowls and trays, and ran away; chasing the great king Danfu, King Jili, and King Wenchang; he did not use the inferior to look down on the superior. He governed his ancestors, which was to respect the superior; he governed his descendants, which was to be kind to his relatives; he governed his brothers and sisters, and fed the whole clan, arranged them according to the order of the ancestors, and distinguished them according to the rites and righteousness, and the human way was exhausted.
When Xie Wan went on the northern expedition, he often whistled and sang to show off his superiority, and never tried to comfort his soldiers. Xie Gong loved Wan very much, but he knew that he would definitely fail, so he went with him. Congrong said to Wan: "You are the marshal, you should invite the generals to banquets more often to win their hearts." Wan followed his advice. He summoned all the generals, but none of them said anything. He just pointed at the four people sitting around him and said, "You are all strong soldiers." The generals were very angry. In order to express his gratitude and trust, Mr. Xie personally visited everyone from the captain of the army to the commander-in-chief and expressed his sincere gratitude. When everything went wrong, the army wanted to get rid of him. He then said, "I should become a hermit." So fortunately he was spared.
The gentleman said: Great virtue is not an official, the great way is not an instrument, the great trust is not an agreement, and the great time is not uniform. Observing these four things, you can be determined to study the root.
Duke Ai asked Ru Bei to learn the funeral rites of scholars from Confucius, and the funeral rites of scholars were written there. Zigong watched the wax. Confucius asked, "Are you happy?" He replied, "All the people in the country are crazy, and I don't know how to be happy!" Confucius said, "A hundred days of wax and a day of radiance are not what you know. If you stretch without relaxing, civil and military officials cannot do it; if you relax without stretching, civil and military officials cannot do it. Tension and relaxation are the way of civil and military officials."
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