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Wang Dayu said to Dongting: "You are talking about whether Cheng is bad or not, how can you play with Sengmi?"
It is said in the past: When Prime Minister Wang crossed the Yangtze River, he only taught three principles: to have no sorrow or joy in voice, to keep in good health, and to express one's thoughts fully. However, the winding path of life is everywhere.
When the king of the country died, he did not dare to receive condolences. In the middle of the outer clan room, facing south, the minor officials spread the mats, the business and the priest spread the quilt, and the scholars washed their hands on the north side of the plate. The body was moved to the coffin, and after the coffin was finished, the chief minister informed the sons, and Feng Zhi danced. The lady sat on the east side, Feng Zhi rose and danced. There are three things that scholars mourn for the emperor: they burn all night, and ride on people and walk on the road.
In mourning of parents, after the funeral, one should cry for the deceased, eat simple food and drink water, and not eat vegetables and fruits; in the time of the minor auspiciousness, one should eat vegetables and fruits; in the time of the major auspiciousness, one should eat soy sauce; in the middle of the month, one should mourn, and drink sweet wine during the mourning. Those who start drinking should drink sweet wine first. Those who start eating meat should eat dried meat first. In the case of parents' funeral, people live in a lean-to house, sleep on straw and a block of pillow, and do not wear mourning clothes; in the case of mourning of the first mourning period, people live in a whitened room, and do not wear sackcloth or bees; in the case of mourning of the second mourning period, people sleep on mats, and in the case of mourning of the third mourning period, people wear hemp and a bed. This is the way that grief is expressed in the place where one lives.
In ancient times, when the princes shot, they had to perform the banquet ceremony first; when the ministers, officials, and scholars shot, they had to perform the village drinking ceremony first. Therefore, the banquet ceremony is to clarify the righteousness between the monarch and his subjects; the village drinking ceremony is to clarify the order of seniority.
Someone asked: "What is the cane for?" The answer is: a filial son who has lost his parents cries countless times, serves for three years, and becomes sick and thin, so he uses a cane to support the sick. If the father is still alive, he dare not use a cane, because the respected person is still alive; he does not use a cane in the hall, because he avoids the respected person's place; he does not rush in the hall, because he is not in a hurry. This is the will of a filial son, the reality of human nature, and the principle of etiquette and righteousness. It does not come from heaven or earth, but is just human nature.
In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
Zi Zhang was ill, so he summoned Shen Xiang and said to him: "A gentleman says 'end', a villain says 'death'; I am almost there today!" Zeng Zi said: "The first funeral is held, and the rest is held in the pavilion?" Zeng Zi said: "For small merits, there is no position, it is the etiquette of the alley. When Zi Si cried for his sister-in-law, it was a position, and women danced; when Shen Xiang cried for Si, it was the same."
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